Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mind Helldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mr.Ordinary
    ASL Info:    21/M/Navy
    Elite Ratio:    3.17 - 64/102/41
    Words: 65
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 775
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 319



    Description:
       yeah about mind hell, it like the only place that i ever get lost and dont know what to do. because your mind allways looks for whats best for you and somtimes there isnt a best choice anmd you get lost


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMind Helldots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is a prison
    So strong, so tall
    So immense
    That No one can escape

    Such a terrible place
    Could consume even the
    Purest of souls

    Society call this
    Prison the human
    Mind
    I call this place
    Hell




    Submitted on 2007-02-25 10:52:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      A girl asked me lately if I believed in the whole heaven and hell thing after death. I told her I wasn't sure I was too preoccupied with the whole heaven and hell thing here on earth that we deal with the reality at hand. :) I liked this.

    Could have used some more elaboration on each though perhaps, thought it could have been expanded for more substance.
    | Posted on 2011-09-05 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      A common view point, this almost struck me as a comedy, so plainly stated that it feels like you are just tossing a cigarette butt out the window.

    It is casual in its doom.

    Do you write sweet things :P ?

    Thanks for sharing I did enjoy this piece

    Jazmine
    | Posted on 2011-08-09 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      okay i have a question? When you wrote this do you believe it is true, that your mind makes your decisions for you? My different view when I read this was that it is not your mind doing what is best for you. Your body does, reacting with hormones and your surroundings the concept can be altered.
    | Posted on 2007-11-27 00:00:00 | by Arieslove | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting very Interesting.
    | Posted on 2007-03-17 00:00:00 | by DonkeyMan | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting, indeed. It sounds like someone trapped inside their own mind and it's like a prision to them. Nice work.

    ~FarFromSanityy~
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by FarFromSanityy | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting, indeed. It sounds like someone trapped inside their own mind and it's like a prision to them. Nice work.

    ~FarFromSanityy~
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by FarFromSanityy | [ Reply to This ]
      It's pretty good, but if only you could make it alittle longer.
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by Two Meters Away | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like this piece. it's so true, good write. joanna
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by heartless_ | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like this. It's interesting.
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by ChimeraNytemare | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    135982

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry