Description: Okay, so I took out a few lines, and a couple of words, and am experimenting with line breaks. I have a very difficult time with line breaks. I tend to jsut write the poem any which way, because I prefer my poems to be read aloud, and one can insert one's own line breaks that way. Still, as I post most of it online, here's my attempt at making this poem more readable.
Walking down the street,
something about my hips moving
turns the sidewalk into an auction
Men shout bids out of moving cars,
fragments of words touch my ears
I am sold for a paltry price
to a toothless drooling visual junkie
Can't go out at night,
there are woman-eating shadows
lurking behind every building
My soul cringes,
every time I hear a footstep behind me,
a crunch of rubber on cement
They don't care, don't know,
that they are thirty years my senior
'You need a ride?' is the mantra of the day
Every slow car and every red light
makes me tense,
my shoulders hunch as I walk
The stories of
women haunt the streets,
making every female figure aware
Ears pricked with suspicion,
mind sharp with anxiety
If I smile into a car, am I inviting you?
Does a tight shirt mean I must have room in my pants for you?
You'll inform me of every lurid detail in your stimulated mind
A drive-by humiliation in techno-color
Just for the record,
every smile is not an invitation
Great write, and a vivid depiction of our society at present, in most major cities, this is the sentiment, we are scared frail beings, even here if a person smiles or seem to be friendly you get mugged, or pestered by someone who would like to sell you something or trying to give you a pamphlet, or clean your window with a broken window cleaner, damaging your car in the process if you don't pay them.
But this poem is about something different, woman dress the way the feel, if they feel sexy, then they will dress sexy, not to invite but because of the way she feels, some guys, see that as an invitation, cause of our sick world and probably because of the visual bombardment of the TV screen and movies NSVL, saying that it's ok.
So that could be why a smile could attract unwanted attention, this society of ours is kind of twisted, and the world need to look at itself again and re-evaluate our actions and thoughts.
Great write, very descriptive.
The images that caught my I was:
"A drive-by humiliation in techno-color"