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    dots Submission Name: Hymn of Sorrowdots

    Author: Draigon
    ASL Info:    25/m/Al
    Elite Ratio:    4.25 - 164/196/91
    Words: 147
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1020
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1029


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    dotsHymn of Sorrowdots

    Slowly diming,
    the light begins to be obscure.
    Fading away into the darkness,
    dying away as this day ends.

    The rain falls down like tears,
    from a weeping child.
    Mourning the loss,
    of someone loved.

    Almost gone now,
    the light falls behind a rise.
    Fading away into the darkness,
    dying away as this day ends.

    Drenched slopes mark the landscape,
    as the ground catches the drops.
    The ground tries to offer comfort,
    but to no avail.
    For it only offers one embrace,
    and if this is self inflicted,
    then you make your quarters in Hell.

    Gone now,
    the light falls down the backside of the mountain,
    shrouding everything in a hopeless gloom.
    Sadness permeates the air,
    and tears stain the earth.

    Lost like a helpless child now,
    wandering through the darkness.
    The day is lost,
    and so is the love.

    Submitted on 2007-02-26 22:09:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hey this i cool, it remindes me of a deep obession of love, that eventually is counsumed by darkness, this is a good write.
    As far as the spelling goes, everyone one has there good day and [censored] bad day, high days and very [censored]ed up days.
    Well i told you before and i will tell you again, you are a great writer and are talented.
    well peace the [censored] out. Oh yeah childeren and hell go very good together. lol
    Little [censored] santanists.
    Keep on keeping on.
    | Posted on 2007-03-08 00:00:00 | by WonderfulComa | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow. I like this. You've got some spelling errors in there, but your metaphor is amazing. I don't think I've ever seen it done that way before.

    Don't give up, my friend. Like Orange said, the sun must rise again.

    | Posted on 2007-03-03 00:00:00 | by crimson echo | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the way you compare sorrow to nature and the sun. However one also must remember that tomarrow the sun will rise again. You may have to wait all night, but it will rise once more.

    | Posted on 2007-02-27 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]

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