An entire list of endless praise for a small handful of words? well thats helpful eh?
I don't disagree with what you have said, but I also do not believe you said it all. this doesn't even seem like a complete thought, though what is here is well worded. My apologies if I sound like an [censored], but call me what you will.
If you do happen to take my advice and write more to this, please be so kind as to let me know so I may read it
I can so see you just free versing with some kick ass music in the back, completely doing your own thing. The fact that I'm listening to "horror" musci is probabily contributing to that, but none the less, your shyt's on the level and completely original(without losing the ADD audicence) nice!
Wow, somehow your last stanza is so mysterious and intriguing that I just love it. I'm not quite sure what "eer" means, (I looked it up, and it says that it can either be an adverb, or that it could mean "e'er" as in "ever"), but despite that, I still find it awesome.
I like the explanation of "bubbles" because they really are like us...it's like we are floating around this huge world, just wandering....and we never know what direction the wind will take us (by influence)...and we also never know when our time is up, thus contrasting with the "burst" that you speak of...We are innocently born, yet we decide ultimately where to "float" you can say lol....I really liked it. I think this earned a favorite.
Also, I think those 3 lines could be a poem in itself. It's awesome.
Submission Name: To say you are sorry
