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    dots Submission Name: Foolishdots

    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 820
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 601


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    forever the light dims
    the sun sets in another corner of the world
    and this all alludes to you
    and to me
    and how we used to be we

    i fantasize a world thati couldkiss you again
    kiss so sweet, involved into every depthof you
    an entire ocean of misbehaving

    you make me feel rather free
    like lifting to the air a thousand times I could tell you that I still love you
    and give in to my decietfulheart
    like the pague that rids me of glory
    instills me with shame
    i think of you

    Submitted on 2007-02-27 14:44:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      Ummm this is like a naughty unknown secret, i like this, and as always anything you write, for some reason i like to get inside your head and see what you are think, it makes my thoughts easier to navigate, i have no idea if we share like ideas most of the time, but i sure love the way you think.
    Sorry didn't mean to ramble on.
    Well this is wonderful.
    Im going to make like Lennon and peace the [censored] out.
    | Posted on 2007-03-07 00:00:00 | by WonderfulComa | [ Reply to This ]
      "an entire ocean of misbehaving"

    I really like that line.

    Funny, this seems to have been posted the day after you saw Eric. Hmmm...I wonder.

    Anyhow, I like it. I think it's pretty.
    | Posted on 2007-03-04 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      you've become a really really really good writer, hehe. beautiful stuff here. beautiful. yeah, that's about it. peace and love :)
    | Posted on 2007-03-02 00:00:00 | by Solomon Disease | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes this is emotional and to me is full of lost.

    The only thing is that there are a few typos
    clean it up a bit and you shall have something here

    btw how have ya been?

    | Posted on 2007-02-28 00:00:00 | by armand | [ Reply to This ]
      this was very emotional and well spoken ive alwaz liked your posts
    hope all is well

    thanx sandman
    | Posted on 2007-02-28 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the imagery and the emotion in this piece. I think everyone has felt that way at least once in their life.
    | Posted on 2007-02-27 00:00:00 | by demonickitten87 | [ Reply to This ]

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