Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Father Medots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: AeThe Lost Poet
    ASL Info:    19/M/DE
    Elite Ratio:    3.6 - 147/184/122
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/Being a Teen
    Total Views: 440
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 717



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFather Medots
    -------------------------------------------


    Watch over me as a child,
    Shield me from the wind,
    I wish you'd father me,
    But you watch me spin,
    I don't hate nor like you,
    Just torn between the two,
    I know the way you think,
    You think my need are few,
    You're not dead beat,
    But I am you know,
    I'm frustrated with life,
    I need the guide to grow,
    So I bleed and I need,
    Asking do you rememeber me?
    I'm your kin, but it's,
    Like you deny forcibly,
    With me, it's deep in the cut,
    Salt in the wound,
    I'm a rose without petals,
    That will not bloom,
    And I, I soon fear,
    For the day




    Submitted on 2007-03-01 10:07:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      mmm... that's really sad! :( it's makes one think though... I really liked it! well phrased, great words... Good Job!
    | Posted on 2007-03-08 00:00:00 | by Kaygrl | [ Reply to This ]
      very sad, very dark. intreasting topic. nice job though! the only suggestion i have is to break it up into stanzas. it makes it easier to read. overall very nice!
    Write on,
    Lanna
    | Posted on 2007-03-01 00:00:00 | by EmeRalDEyeZ5491 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    136422

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Love written by saartha
    Dream written by closetpoet
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    The World written by jjd
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    prison written by ShyOne
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Etiquette written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry