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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: What About Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: kapri49
    ASL Info:    16/f/canada
    Elite Ratio:    2.55 - 31/69/30
    Words: 267
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 505
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1568



    Description:
       I've changed the chorus a lil bit on this one I need lots of comments so please if your read it comment, Thanks, I appreciate it :)


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhat About Youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    (V1)
    If I told you I loved you
    Would you say you love me too?
    If I told you I need you
    Would you need me too?
    If I took you in my arms
    Would you hold me tight
    If my world came crashing down
    Would you try to make it right?
    If tears fell from my eyes
    Would you make them dry?
    If I were to walk away
    Baby would you cry?

    (chorus)
    Your smile, your charm,
    Your laugh, and your bad boy style
    I love everything about you
    I can see myself with you
    My whole life through
    But Baby what about you?

    (V2)
    If you told me you loved me
    I would say I love you too
    If you told me you need me
    I would tell you I need you too
    If you took me in your arms
    I would hold you tight
    If your world came crashing down
    I would try to make it right
    If tears fell from your eyes
    I would make them dry
    And everytime you walk away
    Baby I'd do nothing but cry

    (brigde)
    And Ohh Baby I don't know
    And I can't see
    What I mean to you
    And Ohh Baby I Know
    And I can see
    What you mean to me

    (chorus)
    Your smile, your charm
    Your laugh, and your bad boy style
    I love everything about you
    I can see myself with you
    My whole life through
    But Baby what about you?

    If I told you I loved you
    Would you walk away?




    Submitted on 2007-03-03 00:44:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was pretty good.... if there was a beat i think this would be a good song....U express ur fellinigs very well....the only thing it very repetive n u should be describe what this person looks like n why dis person has u hooked in a verse so it's spreads out the repitevness... other than dat it's good....

    so yea hoep to hear from ya n keep up the good work

    Max
    Aka
    Lil'Mix
    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice, the write ups are ok to me, alot of repetitions ;) but thats just my part, but hearing the real sonf makes alot of diffrent ;) the music can make it turn out really good.

    But overall, it's good, very meaningfull, keep up the work ;) Songs writers starts form something small such as these ;)

    God Bless
    Dennis
    | Posted on 2007-03-04 00:00:00 | by StylerDen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    12. Does it feel original?



    136587

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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