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    dots Submission Name: Cyphonismdots

    Author: Soulraven
    ASL Info:    31/Male/Illinois
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 510/481/142
    Words: 117
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 481
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 931


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    The fugue of screaming
    Ebony man all dressed in honey
    Tied by leather intersects
    Sweetness wafts through the air
    Inviting hungry insects.
    A spider-line love
    Master's sweet southern flame
    Her sensuous sex
    Her licorice body
    Allured him to feed.
    Splinters of hard candy
    Line the swelling of his cheeks
    Vacating forceps
    Ousting chocolate enameled teeth
    Ordained the sufferer.
    A bee hive
    Bestows its tumescent gift
    Lick addiction perfect
    Lyrical pheromone buss of
    A sugar hungry insect.
    Mind ascend body
    Gratis pain of all the stings
    Love's fatal steps
    Enter memory of her arms
    Sweet southern lips.
    Let the bugs work
    Hunger their pretext
    As he slowly drifts
    Brought back again
    By gentle biting
    Of sweetened insects.

    Submitted on 2007-03-07 14:40:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the imagery of this piece. You have very good language skills.
    However it was unclear to me what the point of this poem was. Is it about a person, or just a sort of abstract thing.
    It doesn't make it wrong, I know there's plenty of poetry written in a very abstract way, but personally I find it hard to read.
    Keep it up
    Regards, Kalinda
    | Posted on 2007-03-08 00:00:00 | by Kalinda | [ Reply to This ]

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