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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Truth (Love)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dolor
    Elite Ratio:    4.49 - 62/83/49
    Words: 47
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 119
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 414



    Description:
       If you put love in all the places it says 'truth', it really doesn't change the meaning.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTruth (Love)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Truth binds like a delicate curtain,
    Relative and revealing,
    Simple and so deceiving.

    Truth may be a cauldron;
    Bubbly and boiling,
    New emotions reliving.

    Truth has a passion;
    Susceptible but double-dealing,
    Backstabbing never-ending.

    Truth is a weapon;
    Searching and preying,
    Hunting, targeting, striking.




    Submitted on 2007-03-08 15:12:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The first stanza is excellent. Honestly, I think it stands alone. The other three seem repetitive, and not as well put together as the first.
    | Posted on 2007-03-08 00:00:00 | by Clarkie | [ Reply to This ]
      I enjoyed this, though I don't necessarily agree in some minor ways, I can understand your conclusions, and I liked it.

    I would suggest changing the word "may" in stanza 2. All your other stanzas spak boldly, making direct claims or accusations about truth (or love) but this stanza does not. And for that reason it sticks out, and seems out of place.

    Thanks for sharing, and if you add to this or expand on it, let me know, I think it could use some more.

    -Tom
    | Posted on 2007-03-08 00:00:00 | by UnspokenDreamer | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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