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    dots Submission Name: Dreamsdots

    Author: Nani
    ASL Info:    14/Female
    Elite Ratio:    7.23 - 108/46/19
    Words: 99
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 1312
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 613

       This is the first poem I've written for like ever. I just wrote it so I would get more used to poetry. I know it's corny and everything, but I'll write about something that isn't so... corny. And I just wrote this in 5 min so just bare with me people.. o.O. I had no idea what I should have for the title, so any suggestions would be welcome!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Looking into your soft eyes
    I can see a part of me that Iíve lost
    A part that nobody can figure out

    But here you stand beside me
    Holding me tightly against you
    Telling me that everything will be okay

    Touching your soft face
    I could feel warmth all over my body
    I know that I will be protected

    But slowly you fade away
    Moving back into the distance
    Floating towards the ocean colored sky

    Soon I wake up
    To find that youíre not with me
    You never were
    And you never will

    Submitted on 2007-03-08 22:40:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I like the flow and form of this poem
    my favorite line is:
    Floating towards the ocean colored sky.
    Nice wrie.

    The Poor Man's Poet.
    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by Bobby K | [ Reply to This ]
      for a poem written in five minutes, i would say you did a tremendous job. i did not think it was corny either...

    i flowed very well from what i thought was reality... but instead ended as a dream.

    like a slow.. poof.

    i liked it a lot :) good job

    | Posted on 2007-03-09 00:00:00 | by slickviper097 | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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