Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Disfunction.... has more than just ONE meaning!!dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/378
    Words: 157
    Class/Type: Rant/Venting
    Total Views: 610
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1026



    Description:
       uhhh.... i want to wake up and it all be gone!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDisfunction.... has more than just ONE meaning!!dots
    -------------------------------------------


    How did we get to be so dysfunctional?
    How did we fall apart like this?
    One year things are great
    We all sit
    We eat dinner together
    At the same time
    Has much has I seem to hate it
    I suppose I loved it all
    I'd walk in from school
    "How was your day"?
    A simply yet meaningful question....
    From whom was a caring parent?
    Now they simply bicker..
    As I pass them in that
    Very same room...
    Let me in on this secret... please...
    PLEASE...
    I beg of you?
    I know we cannot rewind what has went wrong
    But we shall try to mend it all together...
    STOP! Stop your yelling...
    YES... you STOP...
    And you...
    Your my Mother..
    Stop smoking that weed...
    Stop... being a mooch!
    Please ... I need you now more than ever...
    Everything is...
    Is...
    Spinning out of control...
    And I can't handle much more of it




    Submitted on 2007-03-10 16:48:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You have very strong feelings and the anger and confusion is not only present in the words, but in the structure of your peom. It's really strong. You could try writing a peom with less confusion in the structure because that takes away from the words a little bit.
    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by DeeBaby6389 | [ Reply to This ]
      You have very strong feelings and the anger and confusion is not only present in the words, but in the structure of your peom. It's really strong. You could try writing a peom with less confusion in the structure because that takes away from the words a little bit.
    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by DeeBaby6389 | [ Reply to This ]
      wow. you kind of bounced back with that one. I think a lot of us have been there, and you have to realise that it isn't you. Adults screw up just like their offspring, and adults DON'T have all the answers.

    Rely on yourself. You're the only one you can count on.

    Raw, upsetting, and good.
    | Posted on 2007-03-10 00:00:00 | by Ben Gunn | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    137443

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Angel Eyes written by poetotoe
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Records I written by Raphael
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Shi written by ShyOne
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cover written by saartha
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry