[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Scary Thoughtsdots

    Author: Swimming Bird
    ASL Info:    30/m/AR
    Elite Ratio:    5.4 - 92/89/26
    Words: 76
    Class/Type: Poetry/Comedy
    Total Views: 818
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 503

       Just a little Silverstein-ish piece I wrote a couple years ago.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsScary Thoughtsdots

    The light is out.
    What do we do?
    My foot has gout.
    I have to poo.
    The monsters under
    My bed have smelt,
    My decent thunder
    And worse I've dealt.
    Oh no! I think
    I heard one cough.
    I'm on the brink
    Of falling off.
    What was that!?
    Something touched me.
    Now I've sat
    In a puddle of pee.
    I want my mom!
    I want my dad!
    The light is on?!
    Oh! that's too bad.

    Submitted on 2007-03-12 09:58:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      and so the child grew to be
    a lover of psychology
    and all things twisted slightly off
    which taught her demons not to cough
    | Posted on 2009-05-11 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
      This made me giggle, I like it, very random and sitting in pee really would suck and not to menton having to poo 2. This makes me want to rock back and forth.
    | Posted on 2008-11-03 00:00:00 | by Lil gal | [ Reply to This ]
      So very cute!
    Silverstein would be very proud of you. :)
    Definetly brought a smile to my face, which was really nice.

    | Posted on 2007-05-23 00:00:00 | by dreamer37517 | [ Reply to This ]
      So cute! ahaha...It helps that I was listening to "why can't we be friends" by Sublime when I read this.
    | Posted on 2007-04-03 00:00:00 | by Waywarddaughter | [ Reply to This ]
      This is seriously messed up. I loved reading it, although the ending was a tad wyrd...in the best possible way.

    I believe in monsters under the bed.

    GBG - Leah
    | Posted on 2007-04-02 00:00:00 | by MornSweetSong | [ Reply to This ]
       i really enjoyed this write, i like the wording you used to make it seem from a childs point of view. very interesting, very cool.
    | Posted on 2007-03-12 00:00:00 | by aleksandra | [ Reply to This ]
      I dont know if this is what you were going for with this write but I found it to be incrediblly sad
    To me you are describing a little girl who has been abused in some way and is very afraid of the outside world and what it holds for her
    I will never understand why people gain satisfaction from destroying a young innocent life by abuse
    I thought the way you wrote this as if from a young small child was perfect
    Excellent Job
    Very Touching!!!
    God Bless

    I will be Praying for you
    Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    | Posted on 2007-03-12 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      I had a really interesting and slightly disturbing mental image. Slightly in a sonnet type set up yet it is direct and to the point. Very cool.

    V.G. Komoscov
    | Posted on 2007-03-12 00:00:00 | by Jose Ragnos | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    prison written by ShyOne
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Cover written by saartha
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]