Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Aestra IIdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Paradox
    ASL Info:    33/m/Earthbound
    Elite Ratio:    4.58 - 1055/434/90
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1172
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1490



    Description:
       In a million different ways of showing pain
    I�ve found humility hiding under the crust


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAestra IIdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Beware!

    Dead men whisper

    There is no redemption

    Dead men whisper

    There is no escape

    Dead men whisper

    There is no air

    Dead men whisper

    The sky is filled with golden hair

    Slowly flowing curves

    Burst

    Honey and infant fire

    Curve

    Supreme tension strings

    Run!

    Run above your rotting life

    Watch!

    Watch your past disintegrate

    Cry!

    Cry a million new memories

    Stop!


    Nurture these moments



    Eternity lies beyond






    Submitted on 2007-03-14 08:56:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very Nice.
    This Made me think about this time I saw a car crash and thanked "god" it wasn't me. But, I think that it was the lines

    "Run!
    Run above your rotting life
    Watch!
    Watch your past disintegrate"

    however, You did seem a little scattered.
    I like it.

    ~Carrie

    PS: THanks for your comment on ANGEL
    | Posted on 2008-05-18 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]
      I love your work. Although sometimes you tend to lose focus and wander around. Here a case is a bit different. Its like you merged your words too much. But still, it I like it.
    And one more remark, purely cosmetical. You should lose double-spacing between lines. I think it would look better that way.
    | Posted on 2007-03-14 00:00:00 | by Poly Jean | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    137747

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Linger written by saartha
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Giving written by jjd
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    Wavelength written by saartha
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Bond written by saartha
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry