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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Confidence of a 5yr olddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Maki
    ASL Info:    17/ female/ home
    Elite Ratio:    5.04 - 208/210/69
    Words: 500
    Class/Type: Rant/Comedy
    Total Views: 1108
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2766



    Description:
       Yea, I was really bored in Math and decided to do a Drabble. It all started with me wanting to write something with a person saying, " Yellow, Yellow and cheese." And it just went from there.

    I dont know when I decided I wanted a small moral in there but it peeked its head in there. I guess because I've been wondering where we lose our confidence in ourselves for our teenage years. Even if you think you strongly know who you are, there is still doubt, even if it's subtle. I'm working on getting rid of it and developing myself.


    I really didn't plan on it being so long, hope you all can survive it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsConfidence of a 5yr olddots
    -------------------------------------------


    So I said, " Yellow, Yellow and cheese..." and they all looked at me like I was crazy. I pointed to thier shirts and said, " Green, Green and milk." Still with a stare, they all looked at thier shirts warily. "HAH!, made you look!" with a chuckle I walked off. I took a turn and went inside the school building. Some may consider me crazy, others may be indifferent. You want to know what I think of me? I Think I'll rule the world some day.

    My eyes are constantly wandering around to see what I can do to fool someone, or trick them into my wonderful jokes. Example: Calling the sky purple insdead of blue because at night it seems a dark purple, so it just lightens to "look" blue. When I wear my dark clothes, like "gothic stuff", I pretend to cringe at the sight of darkness. Why? Because light is so overrated.

    My mom tried taking me to a mental hospital. You know, where you meet with a lady who makes you talk what you feel. She told me it wasn't normal to do these things any more, im "too old" to demand to wear Footy-Pajamas. What's so wrong with that? I dont "like" wearing socks to bed, they slip off in the middle of the night and my poor feet get cold! Does she wante me to get pnemonia?!

    When I got my first kitty, still have him, and I demanded that I can name him...then I demanded that I name him Olive. He was black, like my favorite food...olives. Well, my mother dissaproved of that and asked me to name it a more "pracitcal name" Like...fluffy, or precious...I totally ignored them and always called it Olive, they had to give in.

    I am always sure to laugh at any opportunity, even if it isn't that funny. I also make sure that I laugh at least ten times a day. If I dont laught at least ten times, I have to double it the next day just to make up for the time I lost. Laughter time is very precious to me, Laughter heals. I also love to wear a pointed hat that is so ridiculous, just learned the official meaning of that today, its awesome. Many people marvel at it. It's an awesome princess like crown. They all seem to be jealous because they glare and stare at me like they wish they could be me...or have the crown.

    My teachers seem to praise me for my individuality and my "unique ways of thinking. But... Im really not trying to do anything, even if I do still have the mentality of a 5yr old, it's just me. I am confident in who I am. I tend to wonder whre every one elses confidence went because I'm constantly seeing masks on thier faces of the kids at my school.

    I've only got one question to ask.

    Why?




    Submitted on 2007-03-15 00:41:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      A bit too long. You need some extraneous material to establish your personality in the readers' minds, but I think you could pull out some material. Also, do some spell-checking and proofing! Quite a few errors.
    The "Why?" at the end is drained of some of its relevance and power because of the question posed 2 sentences earlier ("...where everyone else's confidence went.").
    It's a good question. I (much older than you) have wondered about something similar - why do lives begun with confidence and promise go awry> You might want to look at my quartet, "Bent Twig" (1-4). It provides perhaps a partial answer.
    An interesting write.
    fred
    | Posted on 2007-04-04 00:00:00 | by fredmelden | [ Reply to This ]
      It's not just the confidence of a five year old, but all of childhood.

    What's more, it's that bullet proof happiness - nothing can cause it to crash.

    It doesn't make apologies for anything or anyone.

    Quick little things : "their faces" as it is should be "the faces" or the entire statement reworked. Also, "unique way of thinking" or "unique" - you're missing a pair of quotes.
    | Posted on 2007-03-15 00:00:00 | by Fizzlethorpe | [ Reply to This ]
      We as teenagers often stumble through our adolescence demanding our identity and forming it out of our peers. Unfortunately we don't always realise that our peers cannot possibly form OUR identity, since they're so busy trying to find their own.
    Yellow, yellow and cheese..thats an interesting identity..
    I got scolded last week for "excessive happiness". Is that a bad thing?
    I was going to rule the world! But I got distracted by something shiny.
    Cheers to individuality, thanks for sharing
    Azuire
    | Posted on 2007-03-15 00:00:00 | by Azuire | [ Reply to This ]


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