[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Rotting Bloomsdots

    Author: Strator
    ASL Info:    22/M/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.09 - 160/142/67
    Words: 311
    Class/Type: Poetry/Death
    Total Views: 775
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1966


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRotting Bloomsdots

    Cold seems crippling, lame meander through corridors,
    aroma's thick with age,
    mark off the days reflections... of my life, they are fading.

    Bringing me down, over and over, but things aren't changing.
    I am chasing down these dreams...the halls crusting with the stinch of the past.

    Past has found its place,
    salvation is no more... will god accept me?
    Peace has been bleached.
    I will pardon my reflections of my life, but they are fading.

    Pull me out of body, I don't want it...rotting me inside and out.
    Feeble frail and rotting descending, I'm lost in it,
    A structure that's collapsing don't want it cast into me,
    Maker take the body, don't want it, it wants me.

    I'm sick and tired of embracing reflections of past time, receive me or cast me away
    ...god please take me away.
    Resistance futile, suicidal ideas...I will crucify my own being and satisfy selfish needs.
    Fuck the deities, justify my own right to what's waiting for me.

    There is this feeling that isn't going away...
    Bringing me back to this fable body, why can't we depart, oh rotten corpse?

    I just want to run, fly kites, wrestle, jump and play.
    Swim through waves that crash to shore memories in my
    cocooned mind, all in misery.
    The darkness overcomes soul, it soars past toward another plain...
    Existence past the door, I sail through purgatory's bay...
    My ticket out as I say, please take me away.

    I asked a god, for poison, cradling me...sown to my dreams along with the souls of the damned...searching out death.
    Blossoms where clouds once were, lying over me,
    held in god's hands...

    Nothing is holding me back as this rotting blooms.

    Submitted on 2007-03-15 12:27:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      [censored] the deities, justify my own right to what's waiting for me.

    how true is that. wow okay i thought that maybe it was a bit extensive and you could take quite a few of those lines and create whole poems with them. but on the whole i thought it was delight fully insightful . the sometimes unsaid struggle between idealistic nostalgia and the dark foreboding of the tormented soul.

    on the whole a wonderful piece.

    | Posted on 2007-03-18 00:00:00 | by in shadow | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]