Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: silly little dreamdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mithrandir
    ASL Info:    28/m/N.Y.
    Elite Ratio:    4.62 - 452/681/113
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Rant/Misc
    Total Views: 802
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 840



    Description:
       I don't know what the hell goes on in my head, I just cant understand where this comes from. first thing I've even attempted writing in months. shred it to pieces if you care or pass it by what ever.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotssilly little dreamdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Could this just be a dream
    a silly little fantasy
    then eyes kept closed
    the way it should be

    peace comes
    in subtle ways
    for this death
    do not grieve

    sun can't burn
    such skin
    porcelain and ever cold
    no worries upon the brow

    just a ghost cast a drift
    wondering which way
    the wind will blow
    how it should be

    this is just a dream
    take control of the fantasy
    to be lucid is to be free

    It's never clear
    what will come
    when living on physically

    all pretenses fall away
    all pretenses fall
    just a ghost
    a castaway

    drift on daydreamer
    you've got it right
    theres more than can be seen




    Submitted on 2007-03-26 21:13:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think this is a really cool piece. The language seems to convey the feeling to which it is describing. I enjoyed reading this.
    | Posted on 2007-03-27 00:00:00 | by nomad knight | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    138970

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Live In Between written by teika5
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry