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12 steps? - ONE step! Stop and no more. No higher power, No making amends, Just stop using and it ends. No mentors, No meetings, No guilt or self-beatings, No more condescending prayer, No more dealers who ensnare Members all too weak of will And those openly addicted still. I wish death to those bastards (who doubtless remain), Living to profit from another persons pain, In full view of the "kindly" and "benevolent" faces, Of the hypocrite Judas fuckers running the places. There's only ONE step you have to take, And it's not their good lord above - You have to stop for YOUR own sake, With help from the people you love. Luck and Strength be with you. Ben Gunn 21.03.02 |
Your poem’s interesting. I’m not sure if I like it though. My brother was an addict. I guess maybe my own personal point of view of the subject might prevent me from really critiquing your writing well… but I’ll try. I like the beginning, it really caught my attention. When I got to the, “No more dealers who ensnare/Members all too weak of will/And those openly addicted still,” I felt like the flow of the piece really dropped out. It feels forced instead of feeling like you just said what you wanted to say. The next stanza gets back the good rhythm again. And I love the end. Perhaps I’m being to frank for not knowing you, but are you the addict or is it someone you know? I’m probably being too personal too quickly but… The last thing my brother ever gave me was an NA key chain, the day before his addictions claimed him. If you’d ever like to talk let me know. :) ~folletti | Posted on 2007-03-28 00:00:00 | by folletti | [ Reply to This ] | Very nice. The anger is definatly present and it even reads like you're talking to someone. I enjoyed reading it. you have true talent with writing. | | Posted on 2007-03-28 00:00:00 | by DeeBaby6389 | [ Reply to This ] | |