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Romeo & Juliets Suicidal Tendancies

Author: LossOfHope03
ASL Info:    16/female/USA
Elite Ratio:    5.76 - 30 /29 /31
Words: 276
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 741
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 2019


The beginning part of this poem is actually the prologue from Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare.

Romeo & Juliets Suicidal Tendancies

"Two Households both alike in Dignity,
In fair Verona, where we lay our Scene,
From auncient Grudge break to new Mutiny,
Where Civil Blood makes Civil Hands unclean;
From forth the fatal Loins of these two Foes
A pair of Star-cross'd lovers take their Life,
Whose misadventure'd piteous Overthrows
Doth with their Death bury their Parents' strife.
The fearful Passage of their Death-mark'd Love,
And the Continuance of their Parents' Rage,
Which but their Children's End nought could remove,
Is now the Two Hours' Traffic of our stage,
The which, if you with patient Ears attend,
What heare shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend."

Juliet: I have a problem with living,
Baby, don't look at melike that,
Please I don't want to be
the reason for your suicide.
Blaming me for all your mistakes.
Your body at the bottom of the lake.
My name scratched across the page,
Babe, it just wouldn't be the same,
Oh Heavens,
Your suicidal tendancies.
Standing on the ledge,
You told me just to go.
I told you it didn't matter if you jumped,
I wasn't letting go.
Let's stick to the script
Die together.
Your body next to mine
Don't jump before I do
Let our deaths be intertwined forever.

Romeo: You wouldn't jump,
Dollface I know you all too well
You'll slowly carve this pain.
Inside me and in yourself.
Give up, that's fine,
You're just committing suicide.
No note? How cruel.
But particularily typical of you.
Let's stick to the script
Die together.
Your body next to mine
Don't jump before I do
Let our deaths be intwertwined forever.

Submitted on 2007-04-02 17:56:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  At first I was going to slap you for ripping off Shakespeare and trying to pass of as your own what obviously wasn't. How ever, you still need to Quote it and cite your source or it is Plagerism. Set it up as an epigraph, but give the Bard his due.
After that, I really enjoyed the discussion, out of character, between Romeo and Juliette. I think it's a great idea and well executed as an idea. Nice work.
The only thing I think would make it "fall (more) trippingly from the tongue" would be to switch around
"Let our deaths be forever intertwined."
"Let our deaths be intertwined forever."
Then you'd also get a bit of rhyme going on to tie those stanzas into finished bits.
| Posted on 2007-04-02 00:00:00 | by DavidHirt | [ Reply to This ]

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