I long to put this behind me
To move on with my life,
With what I have left of this life.
I long to accept that he is not leaving
But my heart aches from my past
From others flaws
From their mistakes
From their poor decision making
I am to blame for expecting the same from him
Yet I am foolish to not expect it either.
I feel he knows my entire life
He knows me from my insides and out
He knows when I'm upset
Even when I put up that front
The very front I've put up over the years..
I have mastered covering my feelings...
Yet he sees right through it.
I feel my ability to read him is not to that extent yet
And I long to be able to read him
As well as he can myself
To know him as he know myself.
Tears reach the surfaces of my cheeks...
With thoughts of never being able to get to that point with him
To be able to know him to the degree he knows me.
Thoughts of temporarily making him happy
And later down the road
When I no longer make him feel
"young" so to speak...
Will I simply be back age... soon to be thrown to the curb...
Yet these thoughts he knows I have...
Brings tears to his eyes as well...
Knowing he'll never leave my side
Yet I have this doubt..
i like, i like!!!
it shows that your a bit....insecure.
that you want to KNOW more in order to HAVE more. yes?
i was a bit thrown off though on the 20th and 21st line. i had to read it a couple times to finally figure out that it basicly repeating itself....you should do something about one of those lines. some what reword one of them.
this gives me a whole different perspective on somebody else now. maybe i should've slow down for her. this write is an inspiring one for me. now i see where i went wrong....
Well, as you can see baby, this poem may have been premature! Things have changed a bit huh? :) No room for doubt anymore... it's you and I forever. I eagerly anticipate the future! As far as you not being able to read me, you do! There's just not that much left to read because I share everything openly with you. and, like you say in this poem, I will never leave your side.
As far as the poem itself goes, it is an excellent write. I'm sure many readers, if not all of them can relate to the emotions you speak of. It is well structured, and flows very nicely. I think it could use more detail in the middle, but I love the last few lines! Plus, I am so very happy to see you write about something other than your immediate family and their tragic circumstances.
This is a beautiful piece of soul searching jackz,
I love it, it almost feels like your having a conversation with yourself, reaching some inner truths,
excellent write!
Submission Name: Doubt
