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    dots Submission Name: married!dots

    Author: Kristen Gudsnuk
    ASL Info:    21/f/CT
    Elite Ratio:    5.62 - 182/229/86
    Words: 129
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1164
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 880

       I'm not really getting married. I was just listening to this awesome song called je t'aime and it was so impossibly romantic that for an instant I thought, maybe I am getting married..
    and this poem is just me being like,
    "my mind is so much more interesting than the real world! screw the real world!"

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    how can I write my paper
    when I'm getting married?
    there's a wedding to plan,
    well, not too much planning-
    we'll drive to the beach and
    declare ourselves married
    and not tell anyone.
    it can be our secret

    a glorious secret that itches to be told
    like a plaster cast on a healthy arm

    how can I focus on something
    so mundane as literary analysis
    when there's an orange sunset to run off toward?
    pale sand cleaving to the soles of our feet,
    and seashells, and buzzing radios,
    seagulls sifting through trashcans nearby
    and the rank stench of dead clams coming from the jagged rocks
    their cracked clam-shells dotting the dark.

    how can I pay attention to this silly boring world
    when I'm getting married?

    Submitted on 2007-04-20 04:06:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Haha. I liked this poem. I thought it was cute. It almost sounds a little sarcastic, and I guess that's one way it could be interpreted. Like she's (I picture this being a girl) spitting out the millions of ideas running through her head and trying to focus on one wedding idea. The plaster cast simile was odd... I don't know, I think it just might fit. How can I focus on this poem I'm ironically writing when I'm getting married? Hahaha. I love the last stanza, too... it's almost childlike. Like she's so excited for this event that every little girl dreams of that her dream is taking over her thought.

    | Posted on 2007-10-29 00:00:00 | by awastedsky | [ Reply to This ]
      Mmmm.. sweet! You're imaginative, literally a day dreamer which I can identify with. I had to laugh at your description about your mind being better than the real world. Too bad you cannot dream Mr. Right straight into reality! Thank goodness for E-Harmony & Match.com or one of those match making sites! Ha! To the work: Excellent thought put down. Smooth style. The only part that does not fit, to me that is,

    "a glorious secret that itches to be told
    like a plaster cast on a healthy arm"

    Perhaps change the analogy to something else to match the theme. You were talking about wrighting a paper and literary analyis in the piece. Perhaps something to compliment those elements.
    To the emotion: I love a romantic or hopeless one at that! I look forward to reading more of your works to see how else you truly are "better than the real world!" ;PCheers!
    | Posted on 2007-04-22 00:00:00 | by Isaac | [ Reply to This ]
      Well done. Oh yes, doesn't love (especially when you're getting married) seem to be the only "real" thing in life. As you said, everything becomes mundane. Love has an unexplainable effect on people, call me crazy to define it as brainwashing.
    And weddings, what an event to plan. I understand, everything must be perfect. Afterall, this is your day is it not. Even when divorced and remarried, there is nothing like that first marriage. It just has all the emotion and excitement for the joyous occassion.

    a glorious secret that itches to be told
    like a plaster cast on a healthy arm

    This defines a good writer. Whether they can convey something easily to the reader. Now most people know how a cast is, you're always yearning to get rid of it. So this was a great way to explain how hard it is to keep it all bundled in. Great job, beautiful piece.

    Well, that is my two cents...though you could say it was more like my five cents.
    | Posted on 2007-04-20 00:00:00 | by djtswing | [ Reply to This ]

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