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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sudbury Winterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: goveiac
    ASL Info:    30/M/Toronto
    Elite Ratio:    2.72 - 57/71/61
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 148
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 677



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSudbury Winterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    A little plea is enough for me
    Just the same I’m not to blame
    One for reason it all fades away,
    I look at you for what to say.

    These dreamers dream with a little lee
    Are swarming me like a group of bees
    It’s all the buzz and not much fuss,
    Holding back one is all for us.

    Barely shot what’s true is not
    Just the same well he’s to blame
    I’m feeling this coming over me
    Once stood tall is now underneath.

    Is this the last of the meaningful?
    Like a Sudbury winter and a bicycle
    Not much sense attached to it,
    But looking back it seemed to fit.




    Submitted on 2007-04-20 13:12:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    3: meh!
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    ||| Comments |||
      The second stanza doesn't quite fit--I think there are too many syllables in the first two lines--but besides that, this is a nice piece of work. Keep it up.

    --crimson echo
    | Posted on 2007-04-21 00:00:00 | by crimson echo | [ Reply to This ]
      amazingly simple and i love the contrasting words of 'sudbury' and 'bicycle', Both fit too well in this piece. You have used a great skill of translating complication into simplicity. truly, a great poem this is.
    | Posted on 2007-04-20 00:00:00 | by vedanta19 | [ Reply to This ]
      A lot of... rhymes as I 'perceive', the rhythm not always fitting, but the ideea related to nonsense is so cute... :)) As you can tell - I love nonsense. :)
    | Posted on 2007-04-20 00:00:00 | by Non-Sens-Uality | [ Reply to This ]
      first i must say that i love gir. i love it a lot. anywho. i like this a lot. i really hope to read more by you soon. it was a nice read. keep posting i hope to read more by you soon.







    tina
    | Posted on 2007-04-20 00:00:00 | by ladiesplanet1 | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
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