Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Infantiledots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: necromance
    Elite Ratio:    2.38 - 43/40/19
    Words: 123
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 826
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 894



    Description:
       uhh... i'm not entirely sure


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInfantiledots
    -------------------------------------------


    Watched the rain hit the ground,
    From the window....
    Shapes under the sheets,
    In the attic and
    (I like to play with dolls)
    He whispered...
    Our corner,
    Stroking my hair,
    Silk (before it rots)...
    Fingers are ice,
    Handled me delicately,
    In the dark...
    and Tears built up
    In the corners.
    Watching myself drown
    In black eyes...
    That roll in their sockets
    When i throw my toys,
    And rip my dress.
    Stain my lips,
    Hide me under your ripped sheets,
    Down the hall...
    Breathing too fast
    (To live),
    You know you see me,
    Through your screen,
    Claw at your neck and
    Scratch the wall,
    Because [i don't dare] forget my demons.
    Hold me down,
    (you're the worst of them all)...





    Submitted on 2007-04-20 14:05:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hehe how are you not entirely sure, sue?
    you have lived with yourself for long enough to understand that your mind doesn't always make complete sense, and that for some reason things are not always strung together in what most would call "coherent thought"

    however, luckily we have similar thought processes, so i am entirely, entirely sure that this is a quite lovely poem that truly reflects sue...
    especially the part about "i like to play with dolls"...one must not forget the dollies! i believe i shall add this pwettyful thing to my favorites list because i like it muchlyful!

    and cake tastes like purple, as we figured out recently

    ~chaos~
    | Posted on 2007-04-21 00:00:00 | by whispered_chaos | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    140942

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Fasade written by jackz
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Cover written by saartha
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    You read free written by poetotoe
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    a safe place written by Daniel Barlow
    Every..... written by jackz
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Shi written by ShyOne
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Records I written by Raphael
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Love written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry