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Author: darkwiccan14
Elite Ratio:    1.6 - 125 /125 /88
Words: 119
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 1276
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 744


my perfect day, guy, place, world. I LOVE YOU C.S. you'll know who you are, and i hope you'll find this and read it. or mabe i'll just show it to u sometime. LOVE YOU!


Awake in this beautiful day,
As you walk towards me,
I long for you to take me

As we both walk hand in hand,
Down this long twisted path,
We talk and talk about many random

You turn to me as I to you,
And feel the touch of your hand,
As I runs through my hair,
And into your eyes that are so

With a quick glance and whisper,
You have stole a quick kiss,
And everything seemed to stop,
And the air became more

All I can say to you is,
I Love you and always
Whether I'm feeling Anger
Or Blue.


Submitted on 2007-04-22 17:47:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  i really like it. the ends of each stanza is good, how you make each word satnd out @ the ends.
| Posted on 2007-05-06 00:00:00 | by VampireMaiden | [ Reply to This ]
  ah, this was a very sweet poem. i'm sure he'll be really touched by this...

as a thought, i think you meant "stolen", and you could probably drop "more" before "crisper" to tighten this up. but hey, just my opinion.

overall, nicely done.
| Posted on 2007-04-23 00:00:00 | by zen-dog | [ Reply to This ]

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