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Driven to insanity


Author: tennisfuzz
ASL Info:    21/F/wandering.
Elite Ratio:    5.72 - 79 /98 /40
Words: 100
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1398
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 822



Description:


painfully simple i know
i did that on purpose...
mabye cause you cant think in big words when your delierious... or mabye im going to make it more interesting later...
number 21 woot... i like my older stuff better then this though


Driven to insanity



Shipwrecked…

Stranded…


Andy shrugged off the slimy seaweed strewn across his stomach,
like one might slip off a jacket.
Agonizingly-----Slowly------he pulled himself off of the beach.


Later
baiting fish,
hatred of
staying here alone, arose. The
days became like years.


Then,
Everything changed. It was dark and black night
Suddenly,
The trees were people. Acquaintances and enemies and
relatives and old friends standing all around him. The half
moon was his ship and the stars were his destination.
Together they left and soared into

heaven.




Submitted on 2007-04-22 23:09:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  The metaphors were something more than metaphors, and the words were amazing. I like the piece, it is wonderful, because the setup was kind of E.E. Cummings-ish with fun little line breaks and CRLFs.

the ending was indeedie a mite happy.

I loved "And then the trees became people"

just struck something with me.

Wishing for more
~Brian
| Posted on 2007-07-24 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
  Were it not for the somewhat happier ending, I would think that you had channeled Poe and Lovecraft at the same time. A marvelous piece, the breakdown of style illustrates the madness, or desolation if you prefer. Man, I sound like an art snot. AP English ruined me.
| Posted on 2007-05-15 00:00:00 | by Ignis Fatuus | [ Reply to This ]
  an E.E. cummings like peice. Idealistic, and very personified. I like it.

he emotion is a strange kind of mirror, and very descriptive.

Feel free to talk to me...

Wishing for more
~Brian
| Posted on 2007-05-07 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
  Excellent! This is such a good piece,the simplicity is what makes it,your use of simple words to describe something so complex,a man going insane on an island,just brilliant.I could say it reminds me of the film cast away or something,but that would do it a great injustice,it was so fresh and unique.I love the end of the poem,about the half moon being his ship,you can see the peak of his insanity and his death.The whole poem for me was great,very clever indeed...

-Craig
| Posted on 2007-04-23 00:00:00 | by Raphael | [ Reply to This ]


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