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Indian


Author: Ygi
ASL Info:    17/m
Elite Ratio:    5.55 - 290 /149 /165
Words: 511
Class/Type: Misc /Misc
Total Views: 1285
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 3263



Description:


has some part of some stuff I didn't really like, spent a bit editing this, but it might still need some more editing. any part that feels forced or too direct ect., just tell me (thanks)


Indian



Tonight I sleep under the moon
windows here aren't built for the shy
the birds all watch me as I fly and
dead trees paint the skies I take you to dinner and no more am I
so lonely

lines of knobs
you'll be one of them soon
ghostly faces in the telephone booth
scrawny corpses in the metal box lifts
chasing mary all round my mind
so many times have we been alone
my beds too small for loving
I chase my shadow in morning
by night it's slipped away
who knows that the thought slipped
who else knows how easy it is
to let your mouth slip and your tongue runs on a bit of thought
you hadn't put too much thought into

fell down on the field
the pigeons pecked my eyes with rainbow beaks
it took weeks for me to find you
stoned gods holding up things that we
couldn't put ourselves up to
put graffitti on the walls
naked indians on dope
now I find I've got a new place to hate
worked my way west just to circle back to east
when it rains we dodge the giants

sunspots in the house of the living
sky stains in the window panes
stoned faces with the eyes falling out chipping
in the cool dry air
I like your eyes more than I can seem to want to

snakes circle through
slithering mazes in apartment buildings
weaving windows through the walls
things always brighten up
these days we just wait them out
a shaman dancing on his last train of
thoughts long gone all the
goosebumps look like craters at night when the spotlight
shines a dim sadness
now the angels whisper tongues flicking from
the horns in their minds

i'll come home to see your
pretty eyes soon
right around christmas time
I'll be home
maybe you'll of moved on and I can get everything I've been waiting for
don't get too friendly with those streets and those men
train ride
giant fields connecting tiny towns
packed with people and their friends
roads full of roadkill and working men
you can take my money
I don't have that much
you can kill my wife but please dont' touch my lover
don't deflower that girl
I saved the best for last

the tiny man will dance across the flower fields
pollened faces spread their lips wide as the
tiny man falls inside

I am the sun tonight
tonight we dine on grape vines
the trees could not contain us
tonight we kiss the sky
black lights show semen stains
we ride upon a shooting star you see the kids that we once were
all our friends who have died
eternal lifes spent as a child
we always thought life was un-fair
I guess we just thought too hard
we're not all we're cracked up to be or maybe i'm just cracking
under the light that shines when you've
gone to sleep and I've
gone to thinking of you




Submitted on 2007-04-23 01:27:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  It's a good start but I feel it needs much work
It's confusing and hard to follow
I would work on the structure and form
Your choice and imagery is wonderful
It just needs to be pulled together and a less all over the place sense
| Posted on 2007-04-23 00:00:00 | by digitalflower | [ Reply to This ]


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