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Hope is gone from my broken heart I saw you and I could not excape My love still flows like a river within But I have an agony I can not explain It has been a long while Since I felt your warm touch My cheeks still have tear stains But I think of you so much Life is a board game It can turn on a dime And wether or not we like it We can not turn back time Torturing winds bring me your scent And angels wings with your smile I try and forget the past that we had But the numbness I have is only mild The loneliness I cannot bear The deceit of your sweet kiss The strenghth in your arms when you held me so close And the whisper of you on my skin |
This is a quite a good piece, Katie..................and pretty mature thoughts here..................the rhyme is not very steady..but its alright................but as Michael said, do check your spellings........ 'Exscape' should be 'escape' 'weather' should be 'whether' 'sent' should be 'scent' 'deciet' should be 'deceit' Just make these few corrections...............and 'The Lost Love' will be much more enjoyable to read! : ) Keep it up! : ) | Posted on 2007-06-07 00:00:00 | by mdsouza | [ Reply to This ] | Katie, this is a wonderful love poem! You have much talent, and this poem conveys not only good structure but a fine story! | | Posted on 2007-06-06 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ] | A fine, fine and poignant piece of poetry....classic lover's lament very well done and stark in its sadness .... (some typos: line 11 should be "whether" line 13 "scent"...) bravo ... bravo ... bravo ... michael | | Posted on 2007-05-30 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ] | |