Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Painful Love

Author: Lavender
ASL Info:    20/F/USA
Elite Ratio:    3.09 - 101 /125 /59
Words: 133
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 812
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 791


I love you.

Painful Love

Sitting silently in my seat
I shudder when you look at me
It's not that I'm scared; no, no, not that
It's just... I'm the one you're looking at
Your dark brown eyes pierce my heart as they stare
Unknowing to what is truly there
The way I feel when you're around
I do not dare to make a sound
For fear of words that I might speak
Words that I don't want to leak
Through my lips, though it hurts me inside
I do not want this love to die
So I'll keep it to myself
But will keeping all this help?
This agony that I feel
Can it really, truly be real?
I hope that I can make it through all of
These things that I feel: this painful love.

Submitted on 2007-05-03 10:09:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  Love. The cruelest of all human emotions!

This piece was excellent, though I would have loved to read more of it... it did suffice...

It brings to mind the film The Moulin Rouge and a quote from that film:
"The hardest thing, you'll ever learn, is to love, and be loved, in return"

But this was a very excellent write, I could almost feel the brown eyes piercing into me...

Take care,
*~ Mist ~*
| Posted on 2007-05-04 00:00:00 | by PrincessDoom13 | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?