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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: for who you aredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lili
    ASL Info:    23 a world of my own
    Elite Ratio:    3.82 - 1290/797/106
    Words: 136
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 929
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 729



    Description:
       i have not writen in a long time and am trying to get back into the swing of things. honest opinions welcomed. i want there to be more imagry in this piece. there is a person in my life right now that just hearing his voice or getting a little email from him just makes me feel safe. he doesnt want to change me and cares for me as i am. i cant put the feelings in to words for some reason. any help is welcome if you have suggestions for any of the stanzas send them my way. i really want to creat something for him to let him know how much he has helped me through the tough days. thought the trials and tribulations of life. he helped me see that i was doing the right thing when i was uncertain. helped pull me though my divorce.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsfor who you aredots
    -------------------------------------------


    You have a way with words,
    they inspire me to the fullest.
    Your words calm the seas of my soul,
    And give me hope for the future.

    You look into my eyes
    And give me a soft kiss
    The feeling of security in my grasp.

    I would wait a life time,
    For just one more minute with you.
    When you’re by my side
    Nothing can go wrong

    You actually listen to what I say
    And treat me as though I am the only one in the room
    My past is what has made me who I am today
    And that is what you like about me.

    I am who I am
    No regrets,
    You care for me as I am
    Not wanting to change me




    Submitted on 2007-05-06 16:41:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      nice. it sounds like who ever this was written for was someone very cool.. someone that loves you very much.. i like this piece its very touching
    | Posted on 2007-05-07 00:00:00 | by kristian | [ Reply to This ]
      This was very good but there somthing missing to give it the "WOW" to it...idk what it is but i like this piece showing that somtime the lil things can be the bigger and the more improtant things. I think if you should this him he would really like this and get a feeling of what you really feel.....

    Well i hope to hear form you and keep up the good job

    Max

    P.S. sorry bout not giving no examples how to give it that wow to or piece...
    | Posted on 2007-05-06 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    12. Does it feel original?



    142000

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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