Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Stardust and Sinner's Ashdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ParanoidParadox
    ASL Info:    22/m/Canada
    Elite Ratio:    3.33 - 89/90/40
    Words: 140
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Serious
    Total Views: 807
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 989



    Description:
       been forever since I've posted. I found this. there were only the first eight lines, so I completed it and put it up.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsStardust and Sinner's Ashdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Smoke rising higher
    Choke upon the fumes
    A line of sinners
    Blackened 'neath the moon
    Crowd roaring higher
    Above screams of pain
    Sneers of agony
    A call of disdain

    You shall be led to your God
    You shall be remembered a saint
    Bow, cower before the great
    Within the altairs of your flaws

    The flames extinguished
    Now seared husks remain
    Purified once more
    This town of sin
    Time to test your faith
    In dead tradition
    Forgive not one thing
    Bask in perdition

    You shall be led to sainthood
    You shall be remembered a God
    Bury and guard our great frauds
    Give into temptation; the fruit

    The stars align tonight
    A child is born, five grown men die
    An angel falls tonight
    Shattered before our very eyes

    The stars align tonight
    Dawning wrong upon the right.




    Submitted on 2007-05-07 23:57:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      well I can't say I entirely understood the intent and meaning of this, I was impressed with some of the language, and the twisting as it were of some conventional clichés.
    interesting read...
    | Posted on 2007-05-08 00:00:00 | by marigold | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    142076

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Live In Between written by teika5
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Whispered written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    The World written by jjd
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry