Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Flamboyant and Kineticdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 30
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 802
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 198



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFlamboyant and Kineticdots
    -------------------------------------------


    That warm sweet day
    we spent lying in the grass
    the sky was flamboyant and kinetic
    changing colors and shapes often and vividly
    like watching a slideshow of abstract art.




    Submitted on 2004-06-14 03:58:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this reminded me of this video we have of our band, and as you watch it you realize that the sky behind us is changing constantly, the clouds morphing and moving. it's a trip to watch! it is like abstract art. this poem made me want to just lay down in the grass and watch the sky! i think i'll go home and do just that! thanks!
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh wow, OH WOW! For me this is a shiver-down-my-spine poem because this combines two of my favourite subjects - colour and watching the sky. This is just awesome cuddle! I loved the use of your word kinetic. I knew it only with relation to Physics (Kinetic Energy) but suddenly I see the word very differently
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]
      OK, you're gonna blow this off, but I would get rid of "so" and "that it was". Those words add nothing, and that means they detract from the ones that do. Beyond that, this reminds me of my teenage days, getting high and watching the clouds morph into dragons or dogs or whatever. Nice poem if you take out those words. Or at least thats what I think.
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by Black Rock Tractor | [ Reply to This ]
      a very unique use of words to decribe the sky...and how you compare it with absract art...perfect...wonderful cuddle...


    smiles ange
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by purplesun24 | [ Reply to This ]
      your descriptions of the sky are very vivid and the whole poem is soothing. you captured such a little moment perfectly. great little love poem.
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      Just crystalised that moment that we all enjoy whether owned up to or not - looking at clouds.
    Short and sweet.
    I usually see the outline of jigsaw map countries.
    And rabbits.
    K
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by Awkward | [ Reply to This ]
      cool. i love the description of the sky, i've never heard those words used to describe it and now that I have i wonder why! hmm...i'd like to see a sky like that:)
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by joe quinn | [ Reply to This ]
      the poem which you wrote is true to me, as I usually watch the skies in a drunken stupor. I feel somewhat glad that someone out there is just like me, for this I honor your greatly. Wo zhen Xihuan Ni Shi. I like your poem my friend.
    | Posted on 2004-06-14 00:00:00 | by SKillz_Heckle | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    14226

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    By the bar written by expiring_touch
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Stretto written by saartha
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    This written by Chelebel
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ME written by jjd
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry