Completely Absorbed
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Description:
God I love her
Completely Absorbed
Crucial point in an unbearable standstill she was gone and I prayed that she was still alright my memory may always serve to blind me but my purpose will always remain inside of me distinctively appreciable an overriding instinct I begin every prayer with symbolism placing her face over any day I wish to forget always more important to percieve as an exit than the red doors that people don't often hold open unmerciful glowing light her shadow casts the width of the sun upon me giving me something brilliant to place my futures in as I melt for what I only pray I can eventually contain keeping the flames for myself even as they threaten to burn me she carries her love in valid proportions as she trips over herself in the halls of conforming spiders the weight of a broken clock bounces off of her sleepy ankles taking her another notch southward till I give her a few more legs to help her out through this new web of pain careful not to touch the cement that blisters the bottom of the square's edge she crawled underneath the squaller with me you don't have to let them walk on you to avoid them the sky is only visible underground so we lift up our wings through the decomposing temperatures swimming through gravel and recycled animals till the earth is tilted on its ugly side for a generation to see then when others are crying we will sneak outside lift up the vail and blow the dark grains off the face of disaster absorbed by changes in the warmth that your chest gathers my thoughts are at a standstill stretching my jaw against the constraints of your skin my warm cheek is covered completely with your smell tasting your thoughts so clearly on my tongue as I resign to them |
Submitted on 2007-05-13 02:04:02 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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| gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous, so can you go through it with me?lol. dont you love how you can tell if i called you gorgeous right there or if i said the poem was gorgeous?lol well both. so THERE!!lol. damn people reviewing before me...im okay with tony though...he seems chill.lol. so....tripping over myself huh? you just HAD to go and put my clumsiness in there.haha. omg i luh you.lol. okay....well...MWUAH...and and and byes... :D XOxoXO, me | Posted on 2007-05-14 00:00:00 | by angelfyre | [ Reply to This ] | wow. symbolism indeed. while i might ask you to recheck your vocabulary here and there (line 10 'then' should be 'than'...) the story you present your reader is surely remarkable. almost too much, at times, as if you yourself were too absorbed with your creation, within these lines. who is the enemy? who do you fight against / avoid, in this poem you have written? why is time such a factor? you shed only so much light into your realm of inspiration, it drives the reader to ask questions. well done... | -tony | Posted on 2007-05-13 00:00:00 | by wonderbread1000 | [ Reply to This ] | |
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