differences by Thief

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: differences dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	Thief
ASL Info:	22/male/plainview
Elite Ratio:	4.8 - 180/80/69
Words:	183

Class/Type:	Poetry/Angry
Total Views:	1063
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	1061

Description:
just needed to get it all out.

differences dots

-------------------------------------------

call me irresponsible or whatever you want to,
the fact is, i got more problems than you do.
i cant afford what you can, my dear,
fancy phones,$20 dollar tickets, or even the latest gear.
youve got it easy and take for granted everyday
you dont have to work for a hard earned pay
i on the other hand work against my will
and just to make it through everynow and then i make i little kill
YOU dont have the death of someone on you mind
your spoiled and protected from MY KIND
you wouldnt last one day in my life
you dont know what is pain, suffering, and strife.
everyday is one step closer to dying
every second is me feeling like crying
but i cant show that shit
and im still dying bit by bit
a broken heart is hard to mend
but its love that allows reality to bend
i will get stronger, and you will get richer
and life will get more bitter
so shut the fuck up and leave me alone
go bother your little fuckin clone

Submitted on 2007-05-14 14:04:05 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
I can really relate i think
sometimes it seems like people are very...
ignorant to whats really going on around them
like they dont understand anything that they havent seen
they havent seen the [censored]
so they dont know the [censored]
you know
i hope i got the right vibe from this post
either way
i liked it

| Posted on 2009-04-17 00:00:00 | by UnbrokenHeart | [ Reply to This ]
Hey there angry handsome,
lol. Don't take that personally(the angry part - I toned it down with the handsome part haha). I just took a look through your poems, and saw alot of anger. It's what poetry is used for - the letting go of emotion. Putting yourself, and everything you feel on display for someone else. Some of us have the hopes that others will see the beauty in our pain, and others are simply doing it as a release. I'm going to guess you need the release?
Quite frankly, if you wanted praise from your releases, the only thing I'd tell you to change is maybe just a little grammar editing.
Your pain and anger, anguish and thought are all laying out on my computer screen; you got it across so well. Your view on the world was not only explained but completely Told. Like cramming the words into your readers mouth, so that when they leave, they might just say the same things.
That's what draws my attention to you. I find it brilliant in a somewhat warped way. It's art as it should be.
Yet, I would love to see what you're capable of if you pushed yourself for another genre. Is ranting your strength here, or simply your preference?
Well, you have way too much potential for me to just walk by your page and not leave a comment. Hopefully I haven't said anything to offend you. Feel free to offend me back if I have. lol.
Keep writing stranger. :)
| Posted on 2008-01-26 00:00:00 | by stefhy | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

142579

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.
Stretto written by saartha
On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
This written by Chelebel
Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
Genesis written by saartha
Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
Incubus written by monad
Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
Born of the Mouth written by MyPeriodical
Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
Date night written by expiring_touch
Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
Bam written by Daniel Barlow
All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
untitled written by Chelebel
ME written by jjd
May 31 2018 written by Chelebel

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.