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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Shattereddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Cordell
    ASL Info:    36/M/Philadelphia P.A.
    Elite Ratio:    3.01 - 592/807/391
    Words: 124
    Class/Type: Poetry/Society
    Total Views: 673
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 822



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsShattereddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Thinking how my world was shattered
    was it when I met you
    Thinking how my world is shattered
    and what I should do
    Thereís to many pieces to fix
    to many to find
    pick up my life as if it were sticks
    and itís about time

    Apologize to my parents
    Spend time with my younger brother
    Finish homework I havenít finished
    and apologize to others
    Thereís so many things incomplete
    I wonder if I have the time
    everything else is absolute
    including this rhyme

    I will start by making mends
    to everyone I know
    starting with my friends
    and this will show
    that the pieces are coming together
    each will fit
    and my life wonít seem so shattered
    and thatís about it




    Submitted on 2007-05-14 14:57:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      It started off well, and then it seemed like it drifted. I often do that too. Like the beginning is so strong and bold and then i get to the end and it just doesnt have the pow that the beginning did. But none the less a good topic and a good write.
    | Posted on 2007-05-14 00:00:00 | by Rainin_Raspbery | [ Reply to This ]
      flows very nicely i believe that what i enjoy most about this, also it seems true honest as if its written in first person rather than third.. i also like this aspect of your recently posted write, it makes it easier for the reader to relate.. thanks for posting great job here..

    ~!*Jackie*!~
    | Posted on 2007-05-14 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]


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