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    dots Submission Name: Tears of a Clown- part 11dots

    Author: wilted_flower
    ASL Info:    22 f uk
    Elite Ratio:    2.94 - 42/56/28
    Words: 400
    Class/Type: Story/Friendship
    Total Views: 782
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2098

       Here we go again, this story is still going although I'm no longer sure who is reading it. Are you people fed up with it yet or should I write part 12?

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTears of a Clown- part 11dots

    “Jenny, I…I’m sorry, I don’t really know what I’m doing here. I had a huge row with my, my, boyfriend and I stormed out of the house and I started walking and I ended up here. I should probably leave, I really am sorry but I just don’t quite know what to….” Her voice trailed off as the tears started run down her cheeks, Jenny stepped forward and put a comforting arm around her shoulder “come in Chlo and lets get you warmed up, you look frozen.” Chloe nodded and silently followed her through the open door, why had she lied to Jenny? Tom was her fiancé, not her boyfriend; well he had been just over half an hour ago anyway. It didn’t really seem that important though and she could always set Jen straight when they’d had a chance to talk, she’d forgotten how much she had always liked Jenny, the slightly older woman had always treated like a sister and here she was once again with a shoulder to cry on and a helping hand. Jenny had always said that a smile was the most important thing in the world and she’d always had plenty to give “a smile- quick to give and free to lend” had always been her motto, she obviously hadn’t changed.
    Jenny’s mind was racing, what on earth was Chloe doing showing up out of the blue? Why had she seemed so shocked to hear her own name? And what, oh dear lord what, had happened all those years ago between Chloe and Sam? The questions would wait until she had got her settled and into some warmer clothing, it was a miracle that she had found her way to the house in the pitch black, that girl had a guardian angel watching out for her and Jenny was happy that she did. Jenny walked Chloe through to the living room and sat her down on the giant cream sofa “would you like a hot drink?” Chloe just looked up and nodded dumbly, “here, wrap this around yourself and you’ll soon feel better.” Jen placed the soft woollen throw around her slumping shoulders, from this close a distance she could hear her teeth chattering, standing up straight she made her way through to the minimalist kitchen and started to heat the milk in a saucepan.

    Submitted on 2007-05-15 10:32:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Fleur, I love these. I read Chapter 10 (which I had missed) and the new Chapter 11. I really like the title and the story. I can see this turning into a very good novel. You take the trouble to put in small details and intimacies that help the reader understand the mood and the setting, as well as the story. I think we all want to see more installments! You've done a wonderful job on this!
    | Posted on 2007-05-16 00:00:00 | by Ron Cole | [ Reply to This ]
      HEY I LIKED IT!and yes im waiting for the next part i'vd kept up with all of them so you're not waisting your time.
    | Posted on 2007-05-15 00:00:00 | by vlarrimore | [ Reply to This ]
      hey , it's okay if you toke your time , it's great but a few pointers , at this part " Why had she seemed so shocked to hear her own name? And what, oh dear lord what, had happened all those years ago between Chloe and Sam? " , specially " oh dear lord " part , here , at first you were giving a 3rd person point of view , but later at that specific part you turned in Jenny's point of view , you went to her mind and well , it kind of messed it up , it was good , till that part , it somewhat messed and would confuse the reader , what point of view is that? , you know , am sorry about that , but , I just needed to say that , but trust me , it was great , waiting for the next part , can't wait to read it all , after I finish reading the parts , part by part , am gunna join them and read'em all at once
    | Posted on 2007-05-15 00:00:00 | by Squall Leon Hea | [ Reply to This ]

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