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And there she goes.....


Author: Katrinagolden
ASL Info:    27/F/chicago
Elite Ratio:    7.22 - 228 /213 /53
Words: 127
Class/Type: Misc /Serious
Total Views: 1162
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 836



Description:


Again not my best but I can not get rid of writer's block. Just trying to write so I can finally go back to being how I was before.


And there she goes.....



And there she goes
Just walking by
And there I go
I walk away

She doesn't look back
I look ahead
And there I go
But without her

My life is gone
And there she goes
That part of me
The girl I was
Just walking by

My hopes and dreams
Gone with the wind
Then let it go
And all is gone

The world is dead
Or is it me

A painted veil
Covering the wounds and scars
that life has given me

And there she goes
Just walking by
While I stand cold
My eyes fixed
Staring into emptiness

A life unlived
Dreams unfulfilled
Death
All that I've become
And there she goes




Submitted on 2007-05-17 09:20:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Hum, I love the simplicity of it and what you are expressing.

As the comment before me said it, its not your usual style but when you have writers block anything goes and its always fun to play with different styles to maybe discover something you did not believe you had in you.

Best that I can think of right now is for you not to give up on your goals and dreams. You are still young and full of potential, you can accomplish anything and I mean anything you want. Don't let obstacles or people get in your way of your dreams.
| Posted on 2007-05-22 00:00:00 | by Snowball_24 | [ Reply to This ]
  aah, writers block you might have, but still hardly excuse for such simplicity! ive read a couple other poems of yours, and so therefore i was expecting a little bit more of something here. The rhythm is off, there is no pattern in your writing, from stanza to stanza...im not trying to criticize as harshly as it must seems, but i do believe, as a writer, to work with what is yours, and always display a finished product, not something great still in the making. with that said, i hope you understand, im only trying to encourage your writing. take care.

tony
| Posted on 2007-05-17 00:00:00 | by wonderbread1000 | [ Reply to This ]


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