[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: exdots

    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 251
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1042
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1385


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    I am a child again. I step onto the bus. I listen to music. I watch as my own Tara opens up to me. Fields and Mountains surrounding every corner of this world. I sigh and wish for some outlet for the bubbling ecstacy that this place seems to bring to me now. The air is still and cool, saturated every fiber and cell of my being.

    I observe different pigments of green, in the mossy trees, reflecting in pools of water, on blades of faded and dirty winter grass. I think on different things. I think on the lovely reflections in the river.

    I love the river, the river I believe, loves me. I picture myself crawling through the tiny bus windows, floating out, flying down into the bath of glitter and smiles.

    I swim down.

    Rushing to the bottom, tossing and turning I reach for the mussels at the muddy floor. These are rare mussels, they only live here and no where else in the world. In my river. My paint rock river.

    Drenched and airless, I float down into myself, still sitting on brown leather seats.
    Trees fly by me as we gain momentum. THey fly...swoosh, swoosh, swoosh...by me.

    From this seat I look out and observe every joy in this morning. I float, with a hidden smile, behing my stone face, the rest of the way down the ribbon of concrete, to my destination.

    Submitted on 2007-05-22 12:17:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Its really moving if anything o.o
    kinda scares me though. lol :P
    all around, its a well written piece.
    | Posted on 2007-07-10 00:00:00 | by Fernando Corto | [ Reply to This ]
      This is right up my alley and I, too, feel so taken in and inspired of and by nature and I spend most of my free time at the river.

    I didn't relate the title to the piece but that is not so important.

    I enjoyed this piece and think I'll go down to my river (yes, the love is there!) and do some swimming and surrendering!

    love,peace,joy&smiles to share

    | Posted on 2007-05-23 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the way you wrote this...
    its wistful and imaginative, and the imagery is exquisite

    i love it
    | Posted on 2007-05-23 00:00:00 | by blu_kittin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Summer written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Push written by JanePlane
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    written by Daniel Barlow
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Estranged / Shocks written by Daniel Barlow
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    written by Daniel Barlow
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Fasade written by jackz
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    You do, I Do written by poetotoe
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]