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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: wishdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: DontLetGo421
    Elite Ratio:    2.18 - 118/238/141
    Words: 134
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 718
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 770



    Description:
       woeifhoaiwhefoiaw


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotswishdots
    -------------------------------------------


    falling miserably again into that lust towards you

    wishing more than anything that you feel that passion too

    soon you'll be leaving, but all i can do is ask for more time

    if i told you i truly loved you would that be such a crime?

    i wish, and i hope, and i pray, that i can keep you for what you are

    so i blow on each dandylion,pick each leaf clover, wish on each falling star

    i'm wondering if what we have will be something you'll forget

    'for i know already that i wont, but i'm feeling hints of regret

    the time we had was sweet, the time we had was pure

    to leave me with a broken heart, and your my only cure




    Submitted on 2007-05-25 17:43:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Okay. I liked this poem, but the meter was off. The rhyming was fairly good. But it was kind of short. So, if I were to fix anything about this, if it were my own, I'd make it longer and change it so it had a good meter.

    Great job, though!
    Alaina
    | Posted on 2007-05-26 00:00:00 | by Alaina_Morris | [ Reply to This ]


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    143339

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