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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sunburn and Frostbitedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 80
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 914
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 518



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSunburn and Frostbitedots
    -------------------------------------------


    He has autumn eyes
    of dark green, brown, and gold,
    winter skin of blue-white and pink
    like snow and wind-tickled cheeks.
    His hair is summer brown
    burnished bronze by the sun,
    and his smile is as bright
    as the lillies and azaleas of spring.
    He's as moody as any woman
    from ice to sun in the course of a day,
    and you know that he's mad,
    but that's part of his charm
    for the sunburn remedies the frostbite.





    Submitted on 2004-06-15 04:20:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Grrrrrrrr... This is a perfect description of myself. Have we ever met ? Jokes aside this really resembles me a lot. You bet I like it !
    | Posted on 2004-06-16 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]
      wow i love this write. its great how you took two poloar oppisites and meshed them together that was great. this kinda reminds me of my b/f especially the line about how he can act as if he was a woman. your imagery and descriptiveness was excellent great write
    | Posted on 2004-06-16 00:00:00 | by gigglygirl | [ Reply to This ]
      never thought of anyone having autumn eyes - but that's a beautiful description. i like how you've described this person is all four seasons together. very together write! enjoyed reading it
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]
      i like all the color references. he sounds like quite a beautiful chap! he could freeze a polar bear with his moods, though! good thing he can remedy it with the sun he carries around with him! i knew someone like this once, but the frost got to be too wicked and the sunburn hurt too much! this is really a nice poem, though. i like the lightness of it, yet it speaks of serious under the surface somehow.
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      great poem. the like the comparison between his mood/ facials and the seasons. you've described it very vivid. sweet little love poem, I would say. very well done.
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      Seems like your style has been getting lighter lately...and this text is surprisingly long. It actually made me think of Zimmer-Bradley's The Priestess of Avalon that I re-read a few days ago. Basically, Helena's lover is described the exact same way.
    Sorry, I know this is no critique...but I can't think straight, didn't sleep last night.
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by the apocrypha | [ Reply to This ]
      What a nice way to describe someone. And that picture... That's just eerie, I have one with my wife holding a lion on my PC, and the background is virtually identical! Jikes. As for what you wrote...well, it is beyond comment.
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by Lelik | [ Reply to This ]
      love it ms cuddle..

    im tired so i hope u dont take it as an insult alll im goin to say is
    wnderful.
    i know horrible comment
    smiles ange
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by purplesun24 | [ Reply to This ]
      You would be my type. To be able to accept the one with the other. But I'm affraid I may contain permafrost, and not enough sun.
    The tri colored eyes and tri toned skin also work to let us know the depth of character you are viewing here. A nice techniqe.
    Dave
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by Sandburg | [ Reply to This ]
      Heyy, verr-ry cool! I like this.. I like sunburn remedying frostbite.. yes, and the way you described him, I thought we were going to see you telling us what She looked like. But nope! Foiled again!

    "He has autumn eyes
    Of dark green, brown, and gold"
    I love these lines. I have hazel eyes too, I call the changeling eyes (because they turn green when I'm drunk.), so now I have a new name for my eyes!
    You've added all the seasons, and if there was only an allusion to air you'd have all four of the elements as well.
    Very cool.. I like this :D
    | Posted on 2004-06-15 00:00:00 | by Learah | [ Reply to This ]


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