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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Shawshank Redemptiondots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Doom_Hammer
    ASL Info:    17/m/canada
    Elite Ratio:    1.06 - 36/41/20
    Words: 605
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1064
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 3394



    Description:
       class assignment


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsShawshank Redemptiondots
    -------------------------------------------


    Why have they brought me here?
    what do they think i have dun?
    A crime i grieve to hear about.
    sentenced to life twice over.

    Walking into this small new world
    rock walls all around.
    I'll spend my first night
    in a room no bigger then a tomb.

    The following morning there was a man
    He said he can get it if i have the need
    He said we're all innocent here.
    the courts treating us wrong.

    I'm innocent
    I will be free
    I won't let this place get the best of me
    They can take my time
    they can take my respect
    but they will never take my hope on getting out of this place.

    Time presses on so slowly.
    need to pass my time
    all around us are rocks
    that was a hobby of mine.

    Asked red could you get me hammer
    to keep my mind at ease.
    said i know rocks and would like to make
    a chess board and the peace.
    "don't put it in no one's scull and don't try to escape" Don't make me laugh its not like that you'll see in a week.

    When it arrived it occurred to me
    i could right in the walls so easily.
    1000 years ill do it sooner then that
    threw the walls i will escape.
    all i need is to cover my tracks.
    something like a poster may do the trick.

    A job came up to work in the sun
    when i herd something that could give me an edge
    money was my thing on the out side maybe it will work in here. ill start out with helping him.
    and bet my friends a beer.

    Only drank on suntan days.
    i did it for the satisfaction of being free
    watching them drink was to me
    like drinking on the outside.

    Never a better idea then working for them
    keep my hands clean and ill get anything i want
    anything to Keep my happy.
    working money during the day and rock walls at night i will be free i will take flight.

    I'm innocent
    I will be free
    I won't let this place get the best of me
    They can take my time
    they can take my respect
    but they will never take my hope on getting out of this place.

    Helping the others
    and bring in books
    just to pass the time
    just for amusement
    or educational gain

    Then one day a young man came to me
    said I'm innocent and he knows why
    the man that killed them was not me

    warden said hes pulling your leg
    maybe i should lock you away
    cold and dark i sit alone
    in a cell with not even a light.

    I'm innocent
    I will be free
    I won't let this place get the best of me
    They can take my time
    they can take my respect
    but they will never take my hope on getting out of this place.

    When they took me and pulled me into the light
    I've had more then enough of this place
    in the morning i will be gone
    with left but a hole.

    Free as the wind i take to the road
    a new man in even name
    no one will find me i no longer exist.
    unless you know who i am.




    Submitted on 2007-05-30 15:31:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      what do they think i have [dun]? = done
    could [right] in the walls so easily = write
    1000 years ill do it sooner [then] that = than
    [threw] the walls i will escape. = through
    when i [herd] something that could give me an edge = heard
    money was my thing on the [out side] maybe it will work in here. = outside
    Never a better idea [then] working for them = than



    to me you have just rewritten the whole story in short form and added in a few theories or your own as to what went through his mind with that rock hammer excavation project...

    im not sure this is as effectively done as it could be though i am not sure what the project was asking you to achieve either...

    shawshank redemption is an amazing story and the movie is really well created too... i cannot see it and remain dry eyed...

    im not really sure theres anything much i can say. i liked the refrain that kept popping up about taking away my dignity but never my hope... i guess in situations like those hope is all you have...


    | Posted on 2007-07-03 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]


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    143860

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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