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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: emotions intactdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: denial
    Elite Ratio:    5.76 - 119/82/34
    Words: 147
    Class/Type: Poetry/I am dead inside
    Total Views: 984
    Average Vote:    1.0000
    Bytes: 972



    Description:
       this is rough(no) edit. i know the whole spiel about revising, but fuck that. i'm seven teen. like fuck i listen.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsemotions intactdots
    -------------------------------------------


    flexing some eye muscles.
    left. right.
    left.
    i dribble a lot
    not so good with words anymore.
    they sort of bounce
    and fall down
    against
    each other
    these days.
    and i turn statements into yeah?
    and you know what i mean?
    because sometimes i need some clarification.
    sometimes i need some FUCKING MIND BLOWING INTERCEPTION
    AND NO YOU'RE NOT OKAY
    IM TIRED OF YELLING SOMETIMES.
    truthfully
    this is the only time i've grabbed my head to keep it down.
    really. honest to god. i think absolutely sometimes.
    extremists are either incredable dim or unparelellingly admired for.
    i'm in between
    so oh,
    now you tell me
    i've got to practice my emotions at home.
    get them right. get them easy.
    i can't make sincerity if all i've got are knee jerks and realtime responses.




    Submitted on 2007-06-01 18:22:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      sweeeet poem. im feeling like that for some time now.






    peace
    Grim
    | Posted on 2007-09-17 00:00:00 | by DaGrimReaperess | [ Reply to This ]
      not really.
    but i am coming to destroyer
    at least i think so
    | Posted on 2007-06-26 00:00:00 | by orderly conduct | [ Reply to This ]
      hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
    well.
    im
    not
    real
    sure
    what
    to
    say
    | Posted on 2007-06-26 00:00:00 | by orderly conduct | [ Reply to This ]
      hmmm...
    well. im not really sure what to say.
    youve made it rather clear in your description that you dont give a damn about writing well so telling you to put this through a spell check and to think about your presentation a little more seems a little redundant somehow...


    im not really sure you are actually saying anything in this piece.
    perhaps its the inability to convey emotion in a reliable way when put on the spot... the flexing of eye muscles and drooling at the start and the practicing emotion at home toward the end of the piece.

    im not sure your capitalised outburt is as effective as you seem to think it is.

    man... i dunno... if youre not interested in listening i cant be bothered helping. i guess its as easy as that...
    | Posted on 2007-06-02 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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