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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Kelseydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: UnderlinedInRed
    ASL Info:    17/f/Beijing
    Elite Ratio:    4.28 - 193/254/118
    Words: 281
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 505
    Average Vote:    3.6667
    Bytes: 1761



    Description:
       yea just warning you, if you wanted to read something deep, turn away now. Not kidding. this isnt deep at all. But yeah its for my friend if you didnt realize already, when I moved to China three years ago she was among the first I met, then I learned she just lived 3 doors down and we hung out all the time. I am going to miss her greatly, and I love her. And I cant even imagine spending my last two years of high school without her. :(


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKelseydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I cried today
    Wishing you wouldnt have to go away.
    You moving away,
    Its pretty freaking gay.
    To think its been 3 years,
    Thinking of it brings me tears.
    In eigth grade when I almost died,
    I just wanted to be alone and hide.
    But you saved me from my crapiness
    And I'm glad for your strong happiness.
    It brightened up my life,
    Even through so much strife.
    In ninth grade we didnt talk
    But sometimes we would walk
    Between our houses just enough,
    To rejoice in how life was tough.
    I was drinking,
    You saw me sinking,
    Deeper into someone you didnt know.
    But you never did go,
    That far away from me.
    Because this is where you will always be.
    In my heart, forever.
    Then onto our next endevour.
    This past year, which is drawing to a close.
    All those problems in our lives, and the choices that we chose.
    Family therapy when I crashed your house just to get away.
    And you let me stay.
    Or when Richard entered my life again,
    The age difference was merely ten,
    Until we found about his strong lie,
    That memory that will never die.
    When I broke up with George (that fuck tard),
    You told he he was a retard,
    And that I always deserved better,
    In my mind, you are perfect, forever.
    Kelsey, I will miss you,
    But I hope we will remain true.
    Because I have never lied about what I've said,
    I'll be your friend until the end.
    When you moved one house down,
    And instead of the band 3 doors down,
    we were two,
    but it took me that much faster, to get to you.




    Submitted on 2007-06-07 09:42:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      A very poignant poem, and I can feel the powerful undercurrent beneath the lines. Although they seem a little colloquial, they do no detract from the poem, as the naturalness in it makes the persona seem so much more personal and human, allowing more sympathy and a stronger link between the audience and the poem. I do not feel that humor is part of this work, as it is quite dark, and primarily conveys the sorrow of parting.
    Generally, I really enjoyed this poem, although the ending could have been as powerful as the beginning.
    --Alan
    | Posted on 2007-09-03 00:00:00 | by Saidin | [ Reply to This ]
      Ok my first comment is about the last comment. You stupid Ass wipe. . .didn't your momma ever teach you that if you couldn't be nice you'd get your head beat in?

    Ok back to the poem. It was deep in it's own way. Don't think that just because it's not made up of elagence it's not as deep as anyone elses poem. It tells a story of years of friendship through good and bad. It even encorporates humor making the feeling of loss less hard. It exhibits true emotion and that's where deep really comes from. I really liked it.

    And again to the dick head. . .learn when not to speak or someone will make it to where you can't speak ever.
    | Posted on 2007-06-07 00:00:00 | by Raineyes | [ Reply to This ]
      Humour mixed with deep emotion. It's a winner and a killer, every time. Obviously there's a lot of stuff in here that is personal, in-jokes between the two of you and stuff. But anyone can relate to these things. To the fact that you have your own in-jokes. Like you say, it isn't deep - but it doesn't have to be. The deeper meaning isn't in the words.

    Thanks for sharing.
    | Posted on 2007-06-07 00:00:00 | by Predator | [ Reply to This ]



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