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    dots Submission Name: These Wordsdots

    Author: ladiesplanet1
    ASL Info:    23.cali baby
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 720/463/165
    Words: 71
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 554
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 456

       i miss him and im waiting... probably not as patiently as i should be but im trying

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThese Wordsdots

    Every night before I fall asleep
    These words escape my lips
    Good night my dear
    I love you
    I miss you sweet soft kiss

    Everyday when the sun rises
    These words escape my lips
    Good morning love
    How are you
    Did you sleep like sweet bliss

    Every time I think of you
    I wonder where you are
    Waiting here
    For your return
    I'll be back in your arms

    Submitted on 2007-06-08 23:02:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Full of atmosphere and romance... a wonderful and lyric lover's lament done to perfection! Supeb... I loved it! bravo... bravo... bravo ... michael
    | Posted on 2007-06-19 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
      Awww this is soo sweet! Wonderful poem. Thanks for commenting on mine: Beauty in the Dark. It was something that actually happened to me and the question...how to get passed what you've missed...it was talking about things i know i've missed with my best friend.
    | Posted on 2007-06-19 00:00:00 | by Raindrops | [ Reply to This ]
      i like this i can relate to it.. sorry im not a critic i feel that everyone has their own style and i dont feel right telling someone how to write like a lot of people (and im not meaning this towards you lol).... people sometimes say actions speak louder than words... well, i think this poem counteracts that

    keep writing you have something there.

    | Posted on 2007-06-11 00:00:00 | by truthbetold | [ Reply to This ]
      hi, it could read "to be back in your arms" poe
    | Posted on 2007-06-09 00:00:00 | by poetotoe | [ Reply to This ]
      This is pretty bad. If you don't know that "every time" should be two separate words, you have no place in the realm of good poetry. It just seems like you don't care about your work.
    | Posted on 2007-06-09 00:00:00 | by eliwhitneyradio | [ Reply to This ]
      I kind of already have a tune in my head. This is great. I love this. I've read through a lot of your stuff and it is all really good. You put a lot of thought into what you write and most of it is well written. You have skill. Do something with it bigger than a poetry site. I don't know who you wrote this for but I can tell that you love him. Not to pry, but what happened. You are an artist. I feel like I wish you would write for me just so I could show off your work. I would love someone to love me enough to put me in one of thier pieces of art. Like a master painter, you have perfected writing, almost. With this piece, I see no flaws. It amazes me that there are people out there like you. You encourage me to try harder so that I may be as skilled as you. Continue on your mission to become better but I feel that you have already succeeded. Beautifully written, wonderfully read.

    A Huge Fan,
    RoseKisses **
    | Posted on 2007-06-08 00:00:00 | by ohso_cool | [ Reply to This ]

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