Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Gratitudedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: elephantasia
    ASL Info:    37/F/UK
    Elite Ratio:    3.54 - 398/490/159
    Words: 78
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 698
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 533



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsGratitudedots
    -------------------------------------------


    A fertile pod bursts
    in spores of gratitude
    exploding in joy
    and thankfullness.

    A pebble cast,
    makes a splash into the deepness.
    Warmth expanding in rings
    into infinity
    attracts like for like
    and suprises me with a deep kiss.

    Heart flows out once again.

    In and out like waves upon the sea.

    Toss a grain of sand from the shore
    into embracing wholeness.

    Feel a whole beach arise under your feet.




    Submitted on 2007-06-09 10:09:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      this is a cool piece with simple piece of advice hurled into our awareness in a grain of sand.

    Just one thing I see that looks different to me, but that is up to you, of course.

    Toss a grain of sand from the shore
    upon embracing wholeness
    feel a whole beach arise under your feet.

    I broke the line a bit differently and changed "into" to upon
    dropped the "and" at the beginning of the last line.

    This reminds me of the critical mass idea, hmmm are we sending messages we don't know about?

    Love it,

    Nan
    | Posted on 2007-09-03 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting naturalist piece you got here.. reminds me very much of haikus... although clearly a haiku this is not.

    nature is something awe-inspiring.. i had the chance of witnessing one of its many and delicate glories.. far from my home, i beheld a temperate rainforest.. and it was mighty humbling and i was grateful for every tiny event that lead me there. we are like the pebbles and grains you write about.


    keep it green.


    peace.


    -pietro
    | Posted on 2007-08-28 00:00:00 | by Pietro | [ Reply to This ]
      This piece is very gracious in gratitude and I love when I am in nature and can feel a sisterhood with all that is around me and appreciate "IT", in gratitude, for "ALL" "IT" is.

    When we stop looking at our environment in a contradictory way and see "IT" for exactly what we are we will live in balance.

    love,peace,joy&smiles to share

    tif
    | Posted on 2007-06-09 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      oh, i like this! such gratitude for nature and embracing her beauty. your first strophe is beautiful, an image of the pod bursting to life with joy at simply living.

    you seem one with the ocean, with the tide's flow, and that is as it should be. it's all connected, we're all connected with nature.

    wonderful closing lines. i feel the joy, the embracing, and the sweet feeling on the sands of the beach on my feet.

    bene!

    peace,
    ~Cat
    | Posted on 2007-06-09 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    144521

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    written by Daniel Barlow
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Ache written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Cover written by saartha
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    The Azores written by poetotoe
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry