Dear Caleb- You got within an inch of ruining Pink Floyd for me forever. I dont appreciate crying during "Wish You Were Here" because I happen to love that song and the tears make it highly unpleasant. Im willing to be your friend. Dont mess this up again. And I promise not to tell you that I love you still to the point of desperation and that I miss you.. especially at night.
Dear Jonathan- I miss you even though youre very very close by. Ive thought many many times about kissing you again but Id rather immerse myself in ice water than risk hurting you again. So I will never ever give you a reason to think I want you just in case. Im sorry I couldnt make you happy. But I guess that apology applies to just about everyone.
Dear Dylan- You are freaking cute as hell and I will never love you. Which makes me like you a lot. You are nothing to worry about because you are either in or out and one way or the other I dont end up with any less pieces of my heart. That is more comforting than you could ever know. Thanks for taking up so much of my time that otherwise would have been employed by being emo and writing broken heart songs.
Dear Mom- Thanks for being cool most of the time. Thanks for teaching me the names of songs and for taking me to concerts and for wanting me to be smart and for loving me even when I prove once again that Im an immature little freakshow. Im sorry that I cause so many problems by wanting to do my own thing but thanks for being there anyway.. Especially for helping me dye my hair.
Dear Dad- Thank you very much for making it so easy to leave.
Dear Ollie- I owe you honesty more than I owe anyone anything. So let me say for one that I miss you every day and will always love you. And let me say for two that every now and then I get paranoid that if you dated any guy that I know, he would love you more than me. No matter what guy, no matter how much he liked or didnt like me. I cant explain this fear. But I think its a valid one. But I dont blame you at all. Id love you more too.
Dear Friends- If I havent mentioned you specifically its either because I have no guilt attached to you or because I absolutely cant even think of words to say to you to make anything different. Some of you (R, B, J, T, etc. ) I have so much to say to but it'll never ever change anything so I wont.
Dear Self- You will be fine. You are stronger than most people give you credit for, smart just like people say you are, nice even though it doesnt always show, caring although you show it in strange ways, capable even if you get lost and cant figure shit out, and loveable even if youll never believe it. I wont tell you that youre beautiful because I cant say for sure and it wont make a different anyway. But you are good enough to be someones number one. But you dont have to be to live life. Remember that always.
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