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    dots Submission Name: An Exercise in Vulgaritydots

    Author: saartha
    ASL Info:    27/F/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.03 - 230/390/136
    Words: 63
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 547
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2267

       Before anyone asks, no. This has never been said to me. Worry not!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAn Exercise in Vulgaritydots

                             You told me once
                        that no one else would
                                  love me.

              I was a good girl,
         too pristine and ethereal
              to be interesting.

                             It was a good thing,
                                  you said,
                        I was pretty enough to screw.

              When you weren’t listening,
              I rolled unexplored words
              across an unpracticed tongue.

              “Damn,” I whispered. “Shit.

                                  I’ll escape you yet.

    Submitted on 2007-07-09 02:51:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      Makes me think that you are a good girl who really wants to be bad in order to show this guy who you can be.

    But why do it? If he thinks you're too good, why try to be bad? Why please others? More specifically, why please a guy like this? If he thinks you're a goody two shoes, be a goody twelve shoes.

    Or something like that.

    The title definitely fits with the poem. A person unpracticed in being vulgar has an "exercise" (she practices) in being vulgar.

    Keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2007-07-11 00:00:00 | by manwithnoname | [ Reply to This ]
      That was really good; I liked the added humour at the end. The poem about her being a good girl when judging by the words she says at the end, she’s clearly not, or intends to be no more.

    “I was a good girl,
    too pristine and ethereal
    to be interesting.”

    ““Damn,” I whispered. “Shit.

    I’ll escape you yet.”

    Those are to brilliant contradictions that explain there is more to a person than meets the eye. These lines:

    “I rolled unexplored words
    across an unpracticed tongue.”

    Clearly make the person in who you are referring to interesting to the reader, it keeps us in suspense of what’s going to happen next as there’s a hint that revenge might happen, and from a good girl it is interesting to know what they are capable of on the quiet.

    I like the structure of the poem; it works in favour of it though I haven’t entirely worked out why it’s written that way. But it definitely makes it read better.

    Thanks for the read
    Take care,

    | Posted on 2007-07-09 00:00:00 | by Linzi | [ Reply to This ]

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