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    dots Submission Name: Painteddots

    Author: kiddo13
    ASL Info:    28/F/TN
    Elite Ratio:    5.28 - 70/61/22
    Words: 90
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nostalgia
    Total Views: 629
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 616

       My children are little now, and still I ache inside when I imagine them grown and all the childish joys gone. Oh, how I will miss them!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Paint me a memory of better days
    sunshine on a freckled face
    laughter bursting into space
    fairies between our toes

    Paint me a picture of boyish charm
    knee scrape tears upon my arm
    impulsive heart, defying harm
    a lion in him grows

    Paint me curls and ribbons and lace
    twirls and curtsies, untried grace
    butterfly kisses upon my face
    secrets only she knows

    Paint back time to slow the years
    Each stroke eliminating tears
    Paint the heart that holds them dear
    'til love is all that shows

    Submitted on 2007-07-13 15:48:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This didn't feel that nostalgic to me. It was more of and anguishing anticipation of loss. I think the world crushes our souls. We force ourselves through mindless tasks 5 or 6 days a weak for day of peace and beauty. It seems like I'm always tired. On my days off i generally sleep most of them away. When I worked days things were better. But Shenan and i still act like five year olds at home; it seems our hearts refuse to grow older as time passes. As for your piece the changing of rhyme in the forth line at first just made me wonder what the ****? The trian of though breaked suddenly and I was throuwn from my widow seat off track. But I kept reading and climbed back through the kaboose and in the end the rhythm's bruised but it still works
    | Posted on 2007-07-13 00:00:00 | by shaman | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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