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    dots Submission Name: Who Knows...dots

    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/380
    Words: 225
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 767
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1296


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWho Knows...dots

    I long to be independent
    To feel as if I am not trapped
    Within a prison
    That I built meant for another

    Yet it has confined me in ways that weren't meant to be
    I long to have that certain someone read my mind
    In order for him to know my love for him is true and pure
    In order for him to know this love I carry is everlasting and never ending

    For soon we will be married
    One day have children of my own

    You know I wonder...
    Will I be here in a month?
    Will I have decided this is the wrong path for me?
    Will I ever break from this prison that I have been confined to since a young girl?
    Will you put up with me and these endless mistakes that I just so happen to make
    Will I ever be truly wanted?

    Do you understand where I am coming from?
    Do you understand I am hurting?
    I am longing for freedom
    Freedom I have yet experienced

    See here I am longing for independency
    Yet I am afraid...not knowing
    Not knowing what to expect
    Not knowing... how to deal with these things..

    Wanting to give up...
    Yet needing to prove that I will not
    Prove that I am strong.

    Submitted on 2007-07-19 15:42:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I applaud you for making yourself vulnerable in this piece. The feelings that you have expressed are a window to your very soul. You are transparent in a positive way, people can easily see into your heart. There are a few things you could do better at, and I say this because I believe that you are capable of so much more. Try to describe some of these feelings in a less obvious way. Just read through it and study every line and see what you think you can add to it, and if you see in your own heart that it is complete then that's fine as well. Follow your heart is the best advise I can give you.
    | Posted on 2007-09-10 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ]

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