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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Angels' Rapturedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: TheStillSilence
    ASL Info:    20/F/Out in Outer Space
    Elite Ratio:    5.1 - 180/107/54
    Words: 60
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1151
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 504



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAngels' Rapturedots
    -------------------------------------------


    With broken arms,
    angels carry their prey;
    staggering from the weight.

    Melancholy faces dot,
    the endless sky;
    stumbling the angels fly.

    Thrown away against,
    nature's wicked eye;
    humanity's left to strive.

    Repelling darkness while,
    forgetting light;
    leaving only empty space in fight.

    Hence angels cry,
    away their guilt and sense;
    rapturing souls as the world ends.




    Submitted on 2007-07-21 17:32:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    2: I dunno...
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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is astounding. something I don't normally say about writes. It has a different and yet very beautiful. I don't know what to say about it really... it hits me in a place of my brain I haven't felt in a while. Amazing and practically perfect. Thank you so much.

    - Kyle
    | Posted on 2008-09-11 00:00:00 | by Namlooc20 | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes, this is very well done. I enjoyed it, but not a enjoy of happiness that the angels are that way... but the write itself. lol
    I like the way you don't go about portraying them as how I would normally read people doing so.
    *High five!
    | Posted on 2008-05-14 00:00:00 | by KeeperOfLight | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this poem, it comes across in a haunting melancholic and to me at least, ultimately hopeful way. I would make the following changes, once again, just me:

    Melancholy faces dot,
    the endless sky;
    stumbling, the angels fly.

    Thrown away against,
    nature's wicked eye;
    humanity is left to strive.

    Repelling darkness while,
    forgetting light;
    leaving empty space in flight.

    Hence angels cry,
    their guilt and sense;
    rapturing souls, as the world ends.

    | Posted on 2007-12-17 00:00:00 | by brokenmuse | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm very attracted to this because, no one ever takes this own, because it tends to contraversial. I'm sort a trouble starter so I read this and see the immediate fornt of it and how the word read. I see where it would be contraversial, and that where it is best. Thank you I appreciate this. Never Follow.
    | Posted on 2007-08-30 00:00:00 | by AeThe Lost Poet | [ Reply to This ]
      It is sad. Your talking about angels being broken and guilty, about them having to carry our souls with broken bodies. The idea of repelling darkness while forgetting light is especially interesting, like they're safe from the darkness, but they can never see and feel the light as we can. This would be a reason for them to despise us, which would make them feel guilty. This would also make them not want us to make it "home", so they would be reluctant to take us, which means that for them to take us means that they were forced to do so. This would make carrying us similar to carrying stuff with broken arms.
    | Posted on 2007-08-04 00:00:00 | by Vampiric Death | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh [censored] that's nice , I barely get it but sounds amazing , kinda dunce i am right now , but still i love it , mabye i'll read it over later and understand it better , it's great though
    | Posted on 2007-07-23 00:00:00 | by every48seconds | [ Reply to This ]
      This is such a nice write, I love it.
    I needn't say much more than that; but I will favor it!
    | Posted on 2007-07-22 00:00:00 | by forfila | [ Reply to This ]


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