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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Way Long Ago When I Was Youngdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: xSaraHx
    ASL Info:    17/Female/Earth
    Elite Ratio:    4.26 - 107/75/47
    Words: 610
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Serious
    Total Views: 762
    Average Vote:    1.0000
    Bytes: 3466



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWay Long Ago When I Was Youngdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I was watching a home movie
    Dont ever give my dad a camera :]
    my mom was asking people if they voted for clinton
    wow this makes me cry
    my great gma is talking and standing and acting like in a way I did not know her
    It makes me sad that I never knew her like she was in theses tapes
    she got dimensia and I never really persued a relationship with her
    Everybody looks os young and happy
    things have changed alot
    it makes me sad
    My aunt and her long time bf are in the video too
    They have suffered from drug problems
    Its amazing to see the present being set up as it was the present
    know what I mean?
    My parents are so young and sweet with eachother
    I hope my relationship or marriage will be a cute an sweet as theirs looks
    They started off so poor and young but they had love and they didn't care about all that
    yes they were goofy and super silly
    and I'm sure it was hard sometimes and they struggled alot
    but things worked out ok
    I aspire to be just as they were
    Wow The clothes are wacky and the hair is even worse
    My cousins are still not all born
    What has happend to my world?
    why cant things be as they were?
    I have just turned 2
    I have a blonde mullet
    and find myself wearing lots of polka dots and navy and white dresses
    I just bought a navy blue dress with white polka dots from AE
    maybe I'll wear it for my sweet 16
    I sound just like my mom did
    and she was only 19 or 20
    My daddy looks so thin and strong
    he has a mullet too
    silly daddy his smile is beautiful
    He looks so happy
    before all the stress and worry took over
    I sure was a sloppy eater
    and I just reallized I am not weird for making random noises for no reason
    even in public
    I have been making myself heard from early on
    loud laughtery screams of joy
    for no particular reason
    I got a xylaphone for my birthday
    someone say Child Prodigy :]
    My daddy told me he didnt mind me being a musician
    I play with my new toy but I prefer using it as a drum
    Wow I was Adorable
    I still am
    Im just older wiser
    I talk better
    even tho It was cuter then
    now when I open my mouth I get told to shut it quickly or else
    lol funny the way things turn out eh?
    When I was born my dad said stuff like dude and smacked his gum and my moms glasses reached her forhead and she thought she was a teen queen superstar
    If you know my parents you will quickly realize how things have drasticaly changed
    My brother is being brought home for the first time
    Im jealous yet eager to see him
    Sometimes I think Im mean to him
    cuz Im slightly jealous that he got all the attention and not me after having everyone to myself for a long time
    I was the first born In a long time
    First grandchild and great grandchild
    but I think Im over it
    Its all good kid
    I'm holding my brother and admiring how cute he is
    and Im actualy laughing
    cuz my brother had a "funny shaped head"
    he still does
    Its so big it blocks out the sun
    But thats ok
    I still love him
    and all of my family
    They mean the world to me




    Submitted on 2007-07-24 02:10:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      1. You're still young. Change the title, otherwise it seems as though you're reaching for an authority that you do not require. Nostalgia is permitted without needing to distance yourself from the past.

    2. Proofread before you post. It is hard to follow the flow of words when there are typos or poor punctuation.

    3. Try breaking it into stanzas. It becomes bewildering.

    4. Read it aloud, preferably to a friend. Poetry is as much about a flow of words and sounds as the images it encompasses. This is, again, where punctuation comes into play.

    5. Try to bring it into a more cohesive piece. As it is, it rambles too often into sappiness and has no lasting impression.
    | Posted on 2007-10-12 00:00:00 | by meerkat whimsy | [ Reply to This ]
      adorable really. this was all very interesting and gripping...i could see the whole thing happening in front of me..hehehe..

    thanks, it was quite a enjoyable read..
    | Posted on 2007-07-24 00:00:00 | by vedanta19 | [ Reply to This ]


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