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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the sun collapsingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: blackbird
    ASL Info:    31/male/reykjavik iceland
    Elite Ratio:    2.35 - 194/328/300
    Words: 141
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 601
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1026



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe sun collapsingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    we're embarrased
    to look at animals in the woods.
    i'd rather sink or swim
    on my own momentary personal aesthetics
    than any attempt at realism.

    those trees look good.
    i'm too sophisticated,
    that's my problem.

    i'm stunned i bothered
    to have a body at all,
    & that's why i can't stop
    looking at it.
    like a cloud.

    our path is slow & scarey.
    that's why i wish you were here
    to see the elbows in the trees
    & the slingshots.

    what am i capabable of seeing
    on my own
    besides fire?
    a thousand stairs
    lead me to your temple
    & i'm looking for white trees,

    something new.
    something too stupendous to report.
    something that stops everything.
    the hat of the sun collapsing
    & then the end of the world
    will come to me.






    Submitted on 2007-07-27 12:38:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      i liked this. It had some good imagery and for a change didnt leave me feeling depressed :) the beginning started off very well but then i felt as if the message either got lost or changed.
    | Posted on 2007-07-29 00:00:00 | by TheStillSilence | [ Reply to This ]


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